Silent Killer

TO YOKE HUEI ~

2010-12-14T05:51:00.001-06:00

Stop changing your footer(s).
人是自私的，不要太过在意~ 难免会比较在意自己。毕竟我们的世界就是这样的。
人通常都不太会表达自己的意见。
也许他不是故意的~ 只是说说罢了。
世界上没有笨蛋自有懒惰的人。
麻烦？嗨呀，我不会用华文来讲。
Humans are all the same,
we all live in this selfish world.
Nevertheless,
we must just trust ourself and our feelings towards every single thing.
Those words, that conver, might not mean anything to him, or maybe they are .
Just MAYBE.
Everything that happen must have a reason.

Your favourite code : " What am I to you? "

Actually, dont think so much lah. It's nth de bah. Perhaps because you SARANGHAE. Woooooo~ ithats why. Muahhahahahha~
Should let ah vic know alsooooo. ? Haiyah. You damn blur siah. Muahaahhaah!!!!

------------ ---------- ------------ --------- ------ -------

Muahhaah, yoke huei called me 20 times just for an answer which is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo simply yet she cant guess.
Hoho, she is jumping seven up eight down for the answer.
Too bad, i am not telling her until xmas~
Should be the best xmas present.
But she is singing No No No No No ~
Yokehuei uh,
the prefect model of a blur queen yet funny siols.

Hahahaaha! She is yet asking me another question. She asked one i nv reply she still ask. Muahahahahahaa. Bleah bleah bleah~~

I LOVE SHINee ~^^

She wont be bored(:

2010-12-03T03:45:00.004-06:00

Her PIGGY #1 AND #2 HAS BEEN BACK FROM CAMP && SHE WONT BE BORED(:
BUT SHE ALSO HAVE TO WORK!!

Written by her beloved friend(:

Mindset

2010-12-02T10:17:00.001-06:00

Been thinking a lot about life these days. Yups, you might think i got nothing to do. Duh, it's true. I really got nth to do. Speaking of work, really got me upset. They are super irresponsible and very urgh. Forget it, i hope i can change outlet after the training period. 5 h left.. Juliana! Change with me!

Have been reading the bible and quotes frm tumblr and twitter and guess what. I think i might be able to understand life better. You know, i actually think it is useful to me and it does a big impact on my MINDSET. ( yah, thats the reason why i tittled this post as - Mindset )
Mindset is a very scary thing. It changes everything in a second and make you believe it. Never take it as a joke or take it for granted. You will just regret. As easy as ABC. Actually, changing your mindset is equally as easy as ABC. why do i say so? Hmm. You might wonder, but as long you put in faith and you believe in yourself, have confidence, it's enough. However, believe in the right things.

There are many things in life taht we fewl that is unfair towards us, but if we think differently, it's a whole new thing! It's amazing.

Dont ever be sad about what you had lost but be happy about what you have now and will have in the future. Everything in life is a blessing or can be blessing in disguise. Be positive and everything will turn out just fine. Happiness doesn't depend on what happens outside of you, but on the inside of you.

I love the para on top, at least it is very meaningful to me^^
I am a very sentimental person , not to mention emotional, i tend to fall into deeper depths than people, but if i can pull myself up and had a changed mindset, i dont see why you people cant do it. Is not " I CAN NOT! " but rather it's " I DO NOT WANT TO! " see, mindset again.
We are all gifted in a special way. We must not take these gifts for granted. Neither shld we abuse it. [:

Gameboard

2010-11-27T11:11:00.001-06:00

Officially loving YOU. Hehe ~ ssssh. Our dirty little secret <3

I wanna go out later in the afternoon lah! Ongawh. I want go Nex, it's 1am now and I am still not sleeping. Haha! Shyt, yokehuei's going to nag again. Reason being that i just reached home not long ago too.

Work is starting, very soon. Juliana applied the same job as me! YaY! But seriously those people uh, really. Their attitude..

Random anyways. Holidays are whoah. So boring! LoL! School will start SOON, i guess. :DD

I hate the feeling of being alone.. Those thoughts would just come back to me , making me feel insercue and scared. Always telling myself, to pray. I prayed. But those feelings and thghts just come back to haunt me. I cnt get rid of it. Learning to be independent. Trusting myself that i can do it. I have telling myself all this. Telling myself to be brave. I guess if one day i really couldnt take it. I can do many things... Seriously, i am afraid. Idk why and about what. No one can help me. I have to overcome this myself. They say it's a part of growing up.. But why does it hurts so much..

Though these, for i am thankful i had friends who were willing to support me and guide me through. Thankyou, seriously. And esp, YOU. <3 Mr.J~

Red Camp 7 - Day 2 + Day 3

2010-11-25T23:02:00.003-06:00

*** Day 2 ****

OKay, due to my poor memory, i can only rmb that We are being split up. Waimei and Christina and me are in one grp. We went to the school of Infor.com (?) , well, kinda of interesting though, haha. after that, went to the BA. ( Business and Accountancy ). Well, BOAT. HaH. if you know what i mean. afterthat, went to the school of engineering, great, the car was so awesome that we won 2nd place, and 10 movie tickets. HaH. not bad. LOL.

then there were concerts!!!!!! omgawh. so awesome.

after dinner, We had mass dance, haha, so fun, we are all reunited.

blah blah blah, reached hoome about 11?

*** Day 3 ***

THIS DAY WAS AWESOME TTM. Deyians are all reunited, ( 14 out us were in one whole grp ), but Jesslyn wasnt our SL.. but we had awesome SLs! Ester and Ryo. Ryo was funny. this day was awesome, we went for cca, dance, drums, sign languages. blah blah, then we had lunch, lunch was way fun. after that, we went to dance finish the mass dance! omgawh, and we broke singapore's record by dancing the M dance! cool or not! watch finish the skit! awesome, monkeyboy survived. cried twice. wth, the videos so touching. why in earth do they have to play the song! that song makes ppl cry. then we had dinner,after dinner...... HOP NIGHT. WTF, FANTASTIC TTM !

reached home about 12 plus. awesomeeeee ttm. tired yet exciting.

*** After REDCAMP ***

25/11

CHOIR FAREWELL. Jiaqi! be happppyyyyyyyyy!

had fun, too bad i had to leave early. :(

went to my granny's house and blah blah blah.

26/11

currently on plans at all. AT ALL. work starts next week. i am bored. i am rotting at home, i am onlined, but i dont know what should i do. i got nothing to do, i am so bored. i miss studying, i am crazy. i am nuts. whatsoever. bye.

one thing for sure, i miss 408 and REDCAMP.

Aiyah, VP so what, big uh, huh huh huh. go por teacher more, go go go. be like a dog, wag its tail to ask for treats. hello, please bear in mind , you are only a VP, and do you know how many people actually dislike you ? do you know how much trouble you have caused? excuse me, dont be a teacher's oet and do things at your will lah, complain to teacher more lah, complain complain. in SL also like that right? trying to impress the teachers, when you are not in the position to do so. please lah, you say start the game, how many of us actually are present? and then are you the head? NO. please stop your disgusting behaviour leh, acting big uh.first time in my life, i see VP ordering people ard. the other VP also never, you are THE ONE AND ONLY ONE doing it? WTH. er xin. you wanna be president say out loudly lah, use teachers as your backup. humji only. continue to hide in your shell lah, if you have the guts, dont even come out, please. er xin. PUI.

Red Camp 7 - Day 1

2010-11-22T10:23:00.001-06:00

Met huimin @645 at amk mrt station. The shuttle bus was early. We reached there bout 7.30? Because of car accident in the tunnel. Sat at the bus stop and chit-chat till Wenning came. Waited for Waimei Christina and Jasmine. Was shocked when they come. Waited for Seowting. She poor thing siah. Wasted money...
Went into the hall. The hall was like GIANT. okay. LoLs. Isint the first time i went there anyway. Haha. Introduce blah blah blah. Watched performance blah blah blah. Was feeling quite restless THEN VIKING's performer DANCE SHINEE's HELLO. i high tio liao. Scream and scream and sang along. Then watch performance, quite anti-climax siah. Part 2 continue tmr. The play was soooooo funny.
Moved on to the school of film and media. First station was 3D effect. 2nd one was the studio. 3rd was the adver. Then blah blah blah. Walked alot siah. Then sch of humans. Watched a puppet(?) show? Damn cute. "Sophieeeeeeeee" , " a holeeee? "
then move on the practice cheers and then finally lunch. pasta..... I nv tried it before siah.... Yucky. I got extra carrots! Yay! Hehhehe
Then moved to life sci, omgawh. The Csi thing was super cool. The talk was super entertainin please! The Dr. Was awesomeeeeeee! We learnt about liquid nitrogen! Sooo effing fun.
Next, we moved on to human body parts. I am not very comfortable with that. Didnt pay amy much attention except for the baby delivery. I was grossed out. Eeeeeeeeeyyyuuu. I hate it. Disgusting. Was damn tired already. Went back to hall. And then played games . Blah blah blah. Dismissed ! Went home! And havn sleep yet. Although i am damn tired. Need tp do somethinh first. Hahha! Hmm.
Thats all for day 1. Pictures will be uploaded on fb once i have the time. Meanwhile... Just words. Hehehe.

The Game has just started

2010-11-20T11:46:00.001-06:00

Time flies
Humans ages and die
Friends come and so go
Feelings burn and melt
Emotions fly and fall

This is the journey of life. It is up to you on how your decide to handle all these things by yourself. Believing is the key. However, it is hard to do it. Life is short. We never know what's gonna happen tmr or the next moment. So why not live everyday to the fullest? Be happy and enjoy life. (: no matter how hard it takes , you will succeed. I learnt all these slowly through many supportive friends. (:
If i can do it, even though i am such an emotional person, why not you? (; give it a try. Change your mindset, let things go, the more you think of it, the more you get hurt. The past is the past, why hold on? You shld look towards the future, for it is much more brighter(: all the best, my friend (:

Crap, the content and title doesnt match at all! Darn. Ayish.

SHINee : Juliette, I devote my soul to you.

2010-11-18T05:42:00.002-06:00

*HE IS HANDSOME TTM OR WHAT!

17 November

Woke up and prepared, took bus 45 to Serangooon MRT station, then took the circle line to Paya Layba. After that to Pasir Ris, then took 354. Was suppose to meet Weiwei, and i went off with Branda Wenning seowting Qirui and Jesslyn instead. Breakfast then went back to Chalet, meet Minling Christina and Joontong mid-way, the road very long uh. tired. lols, then slack, played cards, followed the entire group to cycle. Then i stood there and experienced sea breeze. then it started to thunder, roaring a storm. but joke, fake one. rain abit , no more, then went for swimming. was fun at the pool. those guys, all jokers. HAHA. went back, bathe and then bbq-ed. a stupid thing to do siah. BATHE THEN BBQ. JOKE. the BBQ was funny too. HAHA. the cat keep disturbing us. then ard 9, left chalet area with Corin Alan Qi rui, went homeard 1130. and slept @ 2.

18 November

stayed at home and rot.

Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhello

2010-11-16T11:53:00.001-06:00

I bought $20+ worth of SHINee things when i wen out today.. Wait , yesterday, since its already 1+.
I wished i had more money, i wanted those soooo badly. I want it ! I want it ! I want it ! And i am gonna earn it ! Starting work on the 29 Nov, dk if i even like the job, i will continue to find more jobs, probably at a higher pay. With jib experience, should be able to find it. Damn it, why must law restrict us. If not there are plenty of wonderful jobs available to be done. I love those jobs, but sadly for the 18 yrold . Sad ttm.

Anyway, hey. You call yourself a fan? Bullshit. You call yourself a shawol, a blinger? Right, there is something call the WALL, in casw you havn notice, yah, there one that surrounds you, yah that, bang you hair against it or simply just wish it will fall in you. Yay. I will be damn happy. It's not like you are going to be dating JH, neither do i. I mean, hello, he is also human with rights and freedom to control his life , the way he lives. It is his life, we just ADMIRE he, we dont OWN him or whatever eh? How can you control what he do ? Please wake up to REALITY EH, you are not in your dreamland. This is REALITY. WELCOME. Please eh, respect him. If you want us to respect you, you jolly well respect yourself and others first. This is the respect cycle, doesnt it sounds awesomely right? LoL. The fact tht you are able to say such things, i tell you, you are no better than those antis. I dont care whether you want to continue as a shawol or become an anti. Not my prob at all. I dont care. But please, whateve you say, potrays the image of yourself to others. Whatever you potray, gives people impression. And whatever impression they have, will eventually cause you misery. There are not actually one the few of us who saw your posts, but the whole world. SHINee world. And yah, if you dont the fact that JH is attached, well then, learn and accept it, if not, you can just fck off. Leave those comments to yourself. If i am standinv right in front of you, i will surely gv you tight slaps and panda eyes. Idiot. We dont welcome you.

I AM BACK TO BLOGG

2010-11-15T21:57:00.003-06:00

I AM FINALLY LIKE BLOGGING A...AGA...IN.

O Levels is finally over, but somehow I feel that i got nothing to do at home. HaH ! I dont want to clean my room yet, L A Z Y. provided my room is M E S S Y. YaH. HaH !

Alright, starting work on the 29 Nov. Hmm..

I must really get use to the place and the people there... Grr. HaH !

Anyways, I am Proud of myself, I have no regrets for the efforts put in for Os except Physics. -.-

I dont know what to post, but i already posted quite a length(?) .

Oh, I am going class chalet tomorrow. (: YaY ! Will definitely have fun there provided Dearest is able to make it, doubt so though.. anyway, amazing people there to have fun too.

During O level period, i got closer to two people, they are so fun (: HeH ! Love hanging out with them also. Jokes and Mugging. Miss those time where we decide on where to eat, when to meet. HaH ! Yet, times flies.

Ouch, i am sentimental though. To think that, 4 years just flew pass like that. S H O C K.

Still, somehow, remember the first time I step into Deyi, was thinking, why the heck is the uniform B L U E. somehow. I miss Blue now. HaH ! so fast and i am labelled as "school-less" now. HeH ! I guess everyone grew up and changed a lot. for me, i used to type you as "eu". somehow, i feels weird typing "eu" right now, i prefer "you". Attitude and thinking also changed for me. HaH ! is totally different, i guess is call M A T U R E. able to meet awesome friends along the way. I am thankful and happy too. I got to know more people and then have fun with them, even though some of us might not be close , however, i still feel happy meeting you, without anyone, i thiink my life would be different, from quitting band to joining choir. from secondary one to secondary four, truly, i learnt a lot. ( wait, i just stated i got nothing to blog about . LoL -.- these somehow pop into my mind though )

From the moment i am posted into E10, i think that's when my life changed (?) . to much happier and active in class though. HaH ! good or bad thing, the teachers said i am too talkative. OMGAWH. but i am still not as noisy compared to others. HaH !

Well, I seriously cant wait for tomorrow. Hmm.. HaH !

I guess this is why, i am so excited. even typing down, i am feeling excited. crazy or what.

// Thank you Father for bringing me through these times, regardless Emotional or Happy moments, thank you for all these, for they made me grew from there. they made me much stronger on every rocky path. Thank you. //

Going to make passport later though. HaH ! Might be going Bugis too... SHOULD I BUY MORE CLOTHES? or should i get one more closet...

WHATEVER IT IS, I WANT TO BUY THINGS WHEN I GO OUT. HaH ! waste money (?) nononononoooo. HaH ! :D

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Random

2010-10-03T02:37:00.001-05:00

I see no one posts nowadays . All busy studying! Hahhaha! I shall help Kimberly post her dead blog then. I am sure a good friend.
Alright, lets see.
Kimberly is studying now. She is sick and she is not getting well. She is crazy about SHINee. She is buying assement books later. Hmmm. She is having tuition now. Hahaha! I stalked you!

Okay i shall go study too. Biology is awesome. But physics just way sucks. Hmm. Is this even considered as a post? I doubt she will read this. Hahahha! So i guess this shall become my temporary blog until she finds out. Haha!

Hot and sexy friend signing off,
Yours Faithfully
Yuchelle Ee

P/s: I am not going to delete this post. :D :S

Windmill on the window and the wind is blowing the windmill on the window.

2010-09-25T22:53:00.001-05:00

Wind blows the windmill on the window. Tears flow from the eyes of sorrow.
Shattered pieces of glass reflected the heart break upon the words that fall from your mouth.

Care and concern, wanting you to do your very best for O levels. You regretted for prelim.. Whatever, i will just focus on my own studies and not to even care about you. Because the simple reason : you gave up upon yourself.
And there is nothing i can even do but tell you and simply i get a hahaha in return. Thankyou for letting me know this earlier so i wont spend my time on you.

I am so easily trusting people, heartsofted uh. I shall turn into a devil which do not care about anyone but myself uh.

O levels. Counting down. I am half ready.

For the memory of love is sweet, though the love itself were in vain. And what I have lost of pleasure, assuage what I find of pain. - Lyster

2010-08-29T22:24:00.000-05:00

Many things had happened these few days. It has been half a month since i last blogged. :DD
I am contented with my life now. I would not be disatisfied with it anymore. I will do my best. Because God love us and gave us a path to lead.
However, there are obstacles we must overcome ourselves, in order to grow.
Perhaps into a braver person after each obstacles.
Sometimes i wished i had a heart of a man , who doesnt care about anything. But hey, i have to overcome it.
Although much confusion, feared, annoyed, had been instilled in my heart after.. I couldnt believe my ears.
The pain and confusion is slowly tearing us apart. We thought we knew, we dint. We thought we dint, we knew.
See how cruel reality is?
It brings things that you dont want to know to you and makes you go all OMFG. but hey, paper cnt possibly cover up fire. Things are bounded to found out everytime it comes out from one's mouth. Be it a secret / talk / gossip / love , all , the truth will find its way to you, even how you want to avoid it.

Once well-said that the opening was completely sealed up. The exit wasnt opened either. The keys are gone beyond our capabilities of reaching it. Perhaps only some can. We know deep in our hearts, we aint the chosen ones. We know deep inside our hearts that the exit was sealed. The fire was too big. No matter how many tons of water we threw it. The fire did not die down. My heart worned out. My brain shut down. I left. I didnt want to continue. We moved on.
We moved on with guilt, moved on with frustration, moved on with confusion. We have lost our way. The way to the exit. We signed. We want the exit back. But we have lost the keys. We are depressed , sad. Knowing that one day, a miracle would come and knocked down the door that locked us . We prayed. We waited. But all we get were dusts and webs. We tried the window, it was locked too.

Reality. Dreams. Trust. Lies. Whatever.

Disappointed.

2010-08-07T08:18:00.000-05:00

나는 아주, 내가 많은 노력이 투입하고 실망합니다. 그리고 어떻게해야 나가! 난 니가 나처럼이 클래스에 대한 일을 해달라고,하지만 난 것처럼 비록 내가이 일을 지원 해달라고 알고, 그 알았어요. 정말로. 하지만 심각하게, 당신은 그 단어가, 당신은 알지 말 안한다. 당신은 내가 어떻게 상처를 알아? 당신이 알고 있지? :(

I duno get it. Life is soo confusing. I want to be in a dream but not in a reality. Because i am not able to withstand all this pressurizing things. I dont want to be in reality. Anymore. Maybe i will just shut myself up... Forever..
I dun want to be like that. I dun want to. I dun want to! I really dun want to. I dun want to do. I am very tired... I dun wish to trouble anyone.. Anymore...

Hope and just believe ( 그냥 믿습니다 )

2010-08-02T08:11:00.000-05:00

이거 알아? 매번 교사들은 시험 시험 시험 ..라고 시작 난 점점 오전 매우 슬픔을 강조했다. 내 친구 ... 대단해요 하지만 나? 내가 그것을 할 수 있다고 생각합니다. 하지만 할 수 있을까요? 나도 그랬음 좋겠어. 내가 그것을 할 수있는 자신을 얘기해야합니다. 심각하게. 내가 그것을 할 시작해야합니다. 킴벌리, 당신은, 그냥 믿을 수 있습니다. 그냥 믿습니다. (:

I am starting to feel the intense pressure on me. I am going crazy. Hahaha. I am mad. Lol...

Just believe. 그냥 믿습니다. (:

- Everday is a brand new day

Chaotic

2010-07-27T08:07:00.000-05:00

- Everday is a brand new day
Just be happy!

Haven been updating since the 11 July. Hehe. I had fun, happy and stressed memories.

Prelim is coming. And days are numbering. My heart is telling me to go for it but irony my brain tells me fear.
Plus the fact that i have a weak immune system. I am gonna get ill very easily.
Hahaha as if i care...
Anyways congrats to CORIN JIAMIN WENNING HUIMIN VICKY SHENGHWEE for entering DPA first round. :D
I will be the next one right? Just pray and believe. (:

내일 필요가 일어나 그렇게 수학 시험 및 오늘에 이른 숙제가 많아요. 울지의 함성

I am so damn tired. But i hve to hang on right? I have to. Days are nearer. I dun wan to regret but how can i? I must tick of tiredness and laziness. I shall quit sleeping and revise more work. Hehe. Many tests are all rushing like mad cows towards us. Soooooo we are just gonna do our best huh. I might not be able to take in everything . Sometimes i might throw a fit. I am sorry to those ard me. I just cant hold in anymore and i dun wan to give in anymore.
TT I hope my DPA would be successful.. He will guide me thrgh right? He will shower His love on me and help me like He had helped my friends right? I really need to reply on Him nowadays because I definately not strong enough to be emotional independence. I am sorry. :( biyaneh.

11 July 2010

2010-07-11T10:55:00.001-05:00

I am scared and suoer duper nervous right now. I am scared about the outcome and everything. Please be successful. :x
Corin, Jiamin, Wenning!!
Meihui, Yurong, Huimin!!

Goodluck!! :D
Me too...
I amm realli scare. I feel like crying..
Ahhh...

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

8 July 2010

2010-07-08T09:16:00.000-05:00

Well well well, since long i posted. The sch is gettin crazy, they kidnapped us till 4-5 plus then can go home. And sometimes alot of homework as present. Hahaha!
Had Chinese O level oral today. Hmmm. Average. Readin was terrible but its over! Hhaha!

Ss test? Hahhahha! I love it. Staring at the blank page. Wakakaka. Hmm... Well, its gettin quite late. I gonna get some proper sleep to build up my immune system. Its starting to break down. Wahaha. Bye~~~

Loves,
KIM

- Sometimes some words are meant to be secetly kept.

Its 2:08 am

2010-07-02T13:11:00.000-05:00

I CANT GET TO SLEEP! HAHAHAHA! Kinda of lame here. Hahaha! Lack of sleep problem. I cnt get to sleep! :(

The words eu have said today simply means rubbish.

- Sometimes some words are meant to be secetly kept.

SWEET 16~~

2010-06-29T09:58:00.000-05:00

Well, i am offically 16 years old frm today onwards. Hehe~ got a brand new start, gonna start thinking abt big things. 16 years old means i am legal to do things I cant do YESTERDAY! wahahahahaha! (:
My parents bought me alot of things~ THANK YOU! (: notice some changes in my typing? I am going to type all nicely from today onwards in order to practice my proper english. Lets see whether it helps. (:
Thank you everyone who wished me thrgh anything that is possible like msn, sms, facebook, twitter, etc. Thanks for the wishes and presents! Thank you classmates for the wonderful surprise! (; it did surprise me cos i was talking and out of a sudden YA! OMG! I AM SO HIGH! hahaha!
Thank you my tuition teacher! He bought me a gift too! Hehehe! Thanks alot everyone! Really! Eu guys marked the start of my 16 year old life wif fun laughter and joy. I will never forget those words that eu have said to me todayy~ more over. I am happy and thankful today!

Love everyone that make me blush , smile, hahaha. Whatever today! Thanks alot. Love eu very much~ :D

See! Touched right! I noe! (:

- I used to be negative, i will try to stay positive like i had promised. Will i be able to make it?

School's startin soon

2010-06-27T11:45:00.000-05:00

Title says it all. It will be assembly in 7 hours time. And i am awake! At this time. Whoah! Maybe just cant get use to waking up early bah. Hahahah. But anyway. Went to celebrate my advance bdae today instead of Tuesday. Haha. Well, overall its great. Wakakaka. Well, i guess i have to go count sheeps now. Its gettin late. Well, its already late. Haha.

- I used to be negative, i will try to stay positive like i had promised. Will i be able to make it?

Chapter Three

2010-06-25T11:25:00.000-05:00

Lindy? Its just pure imagination or had she really become a part of my life when she sat next to me. I was uneasy beside her. All I could was to give her my awkard smile. Throughout the whole of English Lit, i was thinking about the dream I had. It seemed to be telling me about something, it seemed real, in fact very real. Why can I recall the dream? What makes me remember the dream? I wrote down every single detail of the dream :

Dream I had... creepy.
This girl, Lindy, ghost or human?
Appeared in my dreams , in Lenard's letter. Hit my head with a baseball bat, smile at me.
Appeared like magic in reality.Lindy Kanes. My classmate, my partner, the girl sitting beside. Oh my oh my.

As i scribbled down my dream busily, Mrs Popper just had to mess with me.

Pop: Tristin, would you like to explain the passage on page 242?

Obviously i wasnt even paying attention to Mrs Popper. I tried to cover it by murmuring some gibbish hoping she would pick on another person. Just then, Lindy passed a note to me secretly, i looked down on the table and read it aloud.

Pop: very good. Now, where was I?

Mrs Popper went on with her lesson. I managed a smile at Lindy. The Acegang started to whispered to each other. Jo sent down a mass msg :

-Did u guys c dat? Lindy helped Dumbass Trist before she was popped off.

- Hey, what do eu mean DUMBASS? Its kinda of awkard for me to sit beside her, im sufferin!

- relax, just bear another 4 hours girl. Not like you hvn beared that long before..

- yeah, you managed to put up with Beatrice last time.

- Shut up.

End of our conversation.

4 hours? Helen is right. I had managed to put up with Beatrice the last time. I will do it this time. Beatrice was a show-off girl who brats about how rich and lucky she is and blah blah blah.

- Hows school dear?

I recieved a text from Lenard!

- bad. Tell eu abt it ltr, anyway does Lindy sounds familiar to eu?

- Not really. Why?
- Hmm. New transfered girl. Sittin beside
me. Kinda of awkard. ( told him about the
dream) ya dats abt it.
- Hahaha, cool. Did you made it up?
Kidding. Dont worry ok? Its just a dream.
Gotta go for a stage performance now. Tell
Your friend i said hi. (L)
- (: (L)

Great, now Lenard is going to think that i am sensitive.
I could not hold back a yawn when the new trainee teacher, Miss Kolin mumbered through her lessons. I rest my head on the table and slowly dozed off to sleep...

"Stay away from me!!" I heard a girl screing at the end of a long dark corridor. As i was struggling whether to go forward,
"Tristin! save me!"
Immediately I recongised the voice, it was Rachel !
"RACHEL!" i shouted and ran towards the sound.
"Rachel? Where are you? Answer me! Where are you?" i tried to stay in touch with her but there was no respone.
I stopped. I froze. There she was, lying motionless on the ground. A figure moved behind the curtains right in front of me. I dashed forward and grabbed its arm.
"What are you doing?"
" Mindy! Rachel... "
We walked towards the place where i last saw Rachel's body.. It seemed to be a long walk back to her. It was gone. I turned to Mindy, she vanished !
" Mindy? Rachel? Mindy! Min... Helen, Jolyn, what are you guys doing here?"
They just turned to me like dead zombies, staring blankly at me. A cold chill went down my spine. Screams started to sound down the hallway.
"Where is this place? MINDY? RACHEL?"
I turned around and saw Rachel floating in the air and dashing towards me with furry in her eyes. I screamed and ran. I ran as fast as i could. I reached for a door and hide behind it. Then i saw Lindy, standing about five metres away from me, looking at me and grinning.
" Who are you? What do you want from me?"
" Me? I am your worst nightmare. "
She hissed and began to float in the air, i tried to open the door but in vain. I am trapped. She dashed towards me just like how Rachel did a few moments ago. I screamed.

Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I sat back right up on my chair. My scream must shocked everyone in the class as everyone turned to look at me as if i am a zoo animal. My face turned as red like a tomato. The whole class burst into laughter, except the Acegang and Lindy. The Acegang looked as if they knew what i had saw in my dreams.

" Its just the beginning... "

----------------------------------------------------------
Shyt man. Sch is startin in a weekend time. Haix. Hahas. But i am proud to say i love partial fractions of amaths! Hahahas! Amaths. Eu din expect that right. Hahahas!

- I used to be negative, i will try to stay positive like i had promised. Will i be able to make it?

Chapter Two

2010-06-20T10:27:00.001-05:00

I could no longer hold in my agony. All i could do was to cry. I felt like i have been crying for ages. Just then, I heard Lenard.
"Tristin? I..." I jumped and turned around. I couldn't see anyone. "Wabam" i felt a sharp pain on my head. All i could see is a girl holdin a baseball bat in her hand and smiled at me. I fell, fell into a dark abyss.

"WAKE UP! YOU ARE LATE FOR SCHOOL!"
I woke up upon hearing the ear piercing shout from my mother. I looked around finding for the letter. It was gone.
" it was only a dream.. But it seemed so real. Those feelings, those emotions." i looked at my stomach. The baby is gone too. " phew, what a dream." After congrating myself that i have indeed return to reality, i walked down to have my breakfast.
" Whats all the screaming at night, dear? You had a bad dream? "
" I SCREAMED?" i almost choked on my peanut bread.
" Ya. I thought you were captured by some sort of aliens and ..."
"MUM!"
After having breakfast, my mum fetched me to school.
***********************************************
Tristin Walkerman, age 18.
Attached to Lenard Jakesome, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of AceGang.

Lenard Jakesome, age 18.
Attached to Tristin Walkerman, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of the boy band. STARS.

Rachel Gunner, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of AceGang.

Mindy Jane, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of Acegang.

Helen Jones, age 18.
Attached to Alex Keland, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of the AceGang.

Alex Keland, age 18.
Attached to Helen Jones, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of the boy band. STARS.

Jolyn Medes, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of AceGang.

Joel Ryale, age 18.
Junior High.
Member of The boy band. STARS.
***********************************************Met up with the Aces.

Jo: So hows your Summer Holidays girls?
Helen: Alex brought me to see the stars. Haha. It was soooo romantic.
Mindy: Boyfriend-Girlfriend stuffs uh. So Tristin, what did you do with HIM?
Me: Nothing? I had this werid dream yesterday night. It was creepy.

And i told the girls about my dream.

"Right class, we have a new classmate today, and i trust you will be able to treat her well and make her feel comfortable. Let us welcome Lindy Kanes! " Mrs Popper put on a smile she had forgotten to bring years ago.

Jo: psss. Lindy, sounds familiar.
The girls and I exchanged looks when we heard the name.

Just as Lindy walked into the classroom, i felt a sharp pain on my head. The spot where i was being hit in my dream. I shivered but i kept to myself. I felt a sense of uneasiness when she smiled at us.

"You may sit at the empty seat beside Tristin."

THANKS MRS POPPER. i almost screamed. As she walked towards me, i cant help but to think that she was the girl in my dream. Irony, thats only a dream.

" Isit really a dream? " i began to ponder.

-

.... I am not in the mood to say anythin.

Chapter One

2010-06-17T11:28:00.001-05:00

I looked closely on top of the desk. It was a letter from Lenard. I was overjoyed. Picking up thr letter, i skipped my way to my bedroom. Carefully as i can, i open the letter like how i deal with the jewels back at work. It reads:

Dearest Tristin,

I am sorry. I know i am irresponsible but i have already engaged with Lindy in Australia. I really hope you can come to our wedding this July. I am very sorry Tristin. I have send everything you had given me back to you in a pink package.. Once again, i am sorry.

With Love,
Lenard.

My hand trembled. Tears started to blur my version. I closed my eyes and tears flow down uncontrollably. I shook my head in despair. My hands found its way to my stomach. Our seven months old baby.... Without a father? I cried again.

It was after Lenard left for Australia to work, i realised i had a baby. It happened two weeks before his flight. I was at his house, helping out in his packing.
" will you wait fo me?" he asked.
"sure, why not?" i smiled and kissed him on his cheek to reassure him.
Then it happened. He toss me on his bed and gave a cheeky smile. We make out for a couple of minutes. His hand went all the way down my waist. He had me under control. We slowly enjoyed ourselves till late night. I gave myself to him as a farewell present. Everything went pretty well. But why... Why had he changed his heart?

Who is Lindy?
How can Lenard do this to me?
-

The above story is imaginative. None of the above content is ripped frm anywhere. Purely imaginative. ~~

2010-06-16T12:09:00.001-05:00

Hahahas. I am usin a ipod app to post this. So kinda of seperated frm the pic. Hehee. Its soooo early now like 1.01 am. And wooola. I am here. But of update of my life.

- i think my friends are still out somewhere.
- i think i made 9 ppl smile today.
- i think i nid more sleep.
- i think i seriously nid do homework.
hahaha.

I went swimmin on monday. All the way tp Jurong west. Super fun. Bad news. I din get tanned. :( hahas but i am tanned then before okay!

Tuesday, i forgot what i did as i din have enough sleep that night. Slept ard 2 plus? Hahahas! Whatever. Yokehuei and victoria gave me a surprise when i reach amk. Hahahhas! Thanks lots. Met wanying. Cjat like for ages before vic n me go tuition.

The feelin of havin unlimited is siok. I promise jie jje i wouldnt get hook. (; hehe.

Today was cold cold cold cold ttm. Rain non stop. The weather mus be pitying SG doesnt have a free pool and gave us one in orchard road. To 'attract' tourists. Make up eur mind to be either hot or cold. If nt i will get sick. :(

Hehehe. Gonna play my game before i go to sleeppppp. Its still earlyyyyyy. (; bye bye.

Eu smiled!!! Becox of me! (: hehe!

Me

2010-06-16T11:57:00.001-05:00

M E M O R I E S .

2010-06-11T10:32:00.001-05:00

Title says it all.
M E M O R I E S.
Its somethin we cnt take back/repeat it.
But its somethin that we used to do && will remember it. No matter sweet/bitter/sour.
I read thrgh my old posts jus now~ all the post i have posted frm 31-12-2009 till today 11-06-2010. Almost half a year ago. 100 plus posts. 20% of them are emotional. 10% academic. 2% rants. 15% normal day lives. 3% thankful msgs to friends. 10% of them are random posts. 1% reflection of life. 49% promises i made, promises i have said. Promises mostly to xxxxxxxx && xxxxxxx && xxxxxx && xxxxxx && xxxxxx... I always wanted to fulfil those promises.

Imma nt goin to post ; " i am a failure duno how make. Blah blah."

I wanna say.
To those Xs ,
I will fulfil them i will i noe i can i noe ut. Jus that.. Nvm. I noe i can. I realli am. Esl to ... Ya. (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMANDA! (;

2010-06-10T10:35:00.001-05:00

Went out wif Sheryl&&Victoria&&Amanda to celebrate Amanda's bdae. Went to K. Was realli fun~ hehe.

I ought to take a break sometimes.. Alot if things have been goin on and runnin in my mind. Sometimes i will jus zone out.. Friends told me not to stress myself out not to think so much.. Learn to relax. I hav been tryin to do that. But i feel that is useless... I realli duno how to be independence in handlin my own emotions.. I might be strong n hapoy on the front. But everytime, stress and idk-wht-thing-feelin is takin over whenever i am alone.. Sometimes i jus wan to shout everythin out, cry everythin out. But i duno how. I hate holidays cos its a break frm sch which means i gt alot if time to anyhow think and think. I am sensitive towards stuffs and i might jus burst anytime. I duno how to put in words. Is jus .. Many things in world doesnt seem to go alone... && i am nt understandin it. I duno whats wrong...

Hmm..

2010-06-09T03:57:00.001-05:00

Been long since i update my blog... Or maybe jus a feel days.. I am currently very long now... Haix.

I am sorry. I duno what happen. I duno what to do. It is not eur fault. Its jus... I duno how and what to say. I thght is a way to bond us more by makin a decision. I duno whether is right or wrong or .. I duno what goin on. And no one is sayin anythin. I think i shall sit down and think abt it. Its the last year. No... To be exact.. 3 months before we bid our goodbyes.. I dun wan to be a regretful goodbye.. Whata the point of writin this here anyway... No one reads it though...

HELLO !!

2010-06-05T11:46:00.001-05:00

Its been long aye? Hahas!
Well well.
firstly.
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JIAMIN UNNIE!
Fri was her bdae so i shall say belated here. Teehee. Love ya~

Kkays well. Been goin online these few days. Gonna study frm next week. Lookin forward to 2 things currently. One is the 10 june && one is a secret that one a few people noe. Hehehe. Sssh. Its 12.40am now. Jus got back not too long ago. Maybe an hour ago? hahas! Whatever. But ya. Grr. Idk what i sayin.
Anyways, i was quite rude wif my tuition teacher on fri. I was soo pissed. I dun understand && i ask him again && then he got so impatient. Then i shouted at him askin why he is so impatient at me.
-.- my mum say i shld have asked in another way but not shout but she nv blame me cos is my character :x && luckily Joontong && my bro there. If not i think i ll walk away.. LOL! anyway... Hahas. I will try to be as compose as possible.. (:

I hvn do chem. Die. Hahas. Later than do. I mean a few hours later. Hahas! I duno what to post le.

HAPPY ADVANCE BIRTHDAY BABY(qiaoying) love ya~ (:

Tired... Sick alreadyy can!

2010-05-31T08:39:00.001-05:00

28th May.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALAN LEE! (:

29th May
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAISHREE HONEY! (;

30th May
HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOONA UNNIE(snsd) (:!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY YANICE WEE!

31th May
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASMINE GOH! (:

***********************************************
Todayy is chinese o level . Still okay lah. Hahas! Hope i can aim for my desired grades. Hahs . The aircon is the hall make me sick alreadyy! Hahas! Havin headache and flu and back pain. So i shall jus briefly post.. Blah blah blah. Ya. I shld get some sleep at night which is now. For later. Xxxxxxxx nags again. Hahs! Kkays! Bbyes!

I may nt ve sayin anythin.. But it hurts to see eu like dat.. Move on. It isnt the end.

It doesnt matter as long as eu have tried eur best. True or False?

2010-05-26T08:50:00.001-05:00

Shytty results. Hahas! I totalli dun wan to concentrate on that already. Its killin my othe subjects. Been doin it since Dec 2009. Yes! Improvement! 6.5 marks! Same grade though. F9! Hahas! I was shocked. Realli. Hahs! I dun wan to do liao. I scored 35.5 so to pass i need another 14.5 marks. && 6.5 marks improvement took me half a year.. And to score exactly 50, it will take me another 9 months. By that tye, o levels already finish liao lorrhs. Hahs!

Orrhkkayys, back to todayy. Lets seee, mornin, went to sch earlier than i expected. Only a few ppl inside. Watch Junling and Mich played scramble until the ipod blacked out. Well, no batt. :( then started tokin abt experiences wif stalker wif yokehuei, junling and mich. Laugh alot lah. Then the two SLs went for reportin, so the boys tok abt Dota. While junling and i are tryin to learn Tamil from Jaishree. The lesson was short though. HAHA! then the music played. Alan decided to go down. So eceetone leaves the classroom and went down to sit. Assemble pretty fast and whoah! Mr lee din even see lah. && gv that face. Chi~ wif zhang lao shi ard is pretty fun. I walked in and out, in and out, in and out. He oso dun care. I even went over to 4/7 wif yoke huei to disturb victoria. Wanted go 4/9. But the Mario kip tokin non stop. I thght 10.45 was our recess, was so happy, then junyuan sayy," today is wed lah" ah damn. Hahs! Yeah. After recess, maths. Take back papers lorrhs. Then eng. Mrs singh is realli funny lah can. Then take chairs to hall. I swear the chaie is super heavy. Complained all the way, after that, went home. Hahs. Yoke huei damn funny. Did the NE survey, then facebook, youtube all the way, on ipod now. Wakaka~ currently tokin to wanying in ebuddy, miss chew on fb. Haha! Kkays, till then. Bye.

Will post more tmr. Sch's celebration~

"its eu, eu are the one"

2010-05-23T10:38:00.001-05:00

Pls say that, i noe, its very obvious && eu are jus runnin away frm it..

Friday.
-no idea what i did or whatsoever, lazy to recall, so yea. Oso no one reads my posts, post oso no use..

Saturday.
- Tuitioned @ UJ's. Damn it man. He dun let me say finish. Walk home. Kinda of silence that tye. Idk why, felt to loneliness in me although Joontong is beside me but i jus dun feel like tokin.. Teared a lityle i oso duno why..
I prefer that one..
Then went for facial, hahs, yeah. Then went for dinner, wah siah. Cousins are alll so fun~ fun fun fun. Want for jie jie to upload pics so i can grab all! Muahahaha! (:

Sunday.
- chem tuition. Then shopped ard Bishan. Ate Swensen's. Woots. Hahs. Then after that shopped ard. I bought a pair of new sch shoes. And five shirt markers. Total of $23.80. Sniff. Thanks dad. (: hehe. Then trained alone to Amk, met up wif vic and went tuition. Chat and chat. Do homework. Good news. I havn finish chi, bad news, hand in tmr. But tmr gt the emergency drill. Make it fun man. Dun wan anyone borin thing siah. Hahas. Another week to 0 levels.. 5 more weeks to my birthdayy. Hahs. Random. But i cnt wait for June holidayss. Relaxx!! (: hahas.

Its late now, gtg. 1 plus now. Teeheee. Bye!

Cant eu say it? I think i like eu already!

"That pain is killin eu, it is hurtin eu, eu wanna cry/shout, anythin, but eu jus put on a smile, pretendin to be okay when eu are not, when everyone can see tht eu are upset..."

2010-05-20T09:48:00.001-05:00

The title? I heard that frm a couple of friends when we were chattin. Thanks. (: is jus that, i dun wish to continue showin my hurt side so yeah... But although i still... Hehe.

Right, Chinese lessons starts frm todayy onwards and i duno! Haha! Until i reached sch aft tokin to Joan, Diyana, Joanna. Then i realised. Sorry i am slow. :x AFTER MORNIN ASSEMBLY THEN FIND OUT. imma indeed very fast. Ahem. Orhkkays. Luckily, THANK GOD, not Mr Peng. Is the higher chi teacher Mr Zhang. His lessons are interestin! Wayy better than Mr Peng. Oops. Hahas! He is one funny dude lah can. Super funny. [:
Well, the MnD dancers all went off at 10.15am. For performance. Wonder how it went. The class feels empty at the girls side. Well yea, mostly MnD membera are all girls.. Right. What was i thinkin? Hehe. Psps. He went thrgh a few types of letter writin. Then we choose topic and do. Lalala. So on and blah. Handed in. Wah, damn ps lah, he read my mistakes to the class. Not that i dun like or i like but still very ps. I understand how huimin feela when he read her mistakes. The mistakes are so stupid and eu can question eurself :" i wrote that?" joontong and i had a good laugh. Wakaka. Ssh~ secret. Not realli. Lawls! Anyway, then VE. abt the Dr.Goh thingy.
He is one man who realli earns respect. He is darin. Dare to dream. Dare to do what he says although ppl are unhappy wif it. May eu have a peaceful rest, Dr Goh. Best regards..
Homed. I looked like one idiot can. Drag that stupid umbrella home. Grr. But when tokin to yoke huei abt duno what topic. Maybe abt food? Abt .., cnt rmb jus some random stuffs. I forget i am draggin an umbrella. Until she tell me. Reached home. Then immediately went to clear all my unwanted clothings that is realli takin up alot if spaces in my cardboard. I wan buy new clothes!! Hehe! I decided to surf the net. Muahaha! And guess what, i fell asleep, idk when i slept, was super tired. Suddenly, i fell in the dreams that make me wake up. Zzz. Imma late tuition!! Wah, rush like one mad dog. Wakaka! Then in the end. Late 30 mins. Zzz. Sorry. Ppl very tired nowadays. Haha. Likr havn sleep for ages. Hahahs. Kkays. My eyes already halved liao. Nidda catch my beauty sleep before it runs awayy.

*Ps/ Yuchelle, eu damn idiot eu noe. That tye eu sy the pouch is not frm GUCCI la dey. Is frm LV. Got the logo there so many eu still cnt see. Funny leh. Hahah! && the twitter i help eu change name liao. Treat me smth! Eur live journal super dead. Update leh! Download iPhone twitter . Super fast! && ring me up tmr!! *

WEDNESDAY!

2010-05-19T06:25:00.002-05:00

l0l, the previous post was meant to be under yesterdayy, somehow it did not get posted... so yea..
Well, lets see, rainin in the mornin. drag myself to sch?? UDC started. the openin was lame, l0l0l, played, unfair? fair? onli we will noe.. then went to hall, prize presentation, btw, i played captain's ball. 2nd place. okkay lah, lost to Apollo by 1 mark. hahas. good game, somehow helios gt last this year, big shock.

*got some unhappy things happened along the way, shall not post here. wanna noe, then ask me bah.. *

well, that goes w/o sayin, Yuchelle.
mus this short. hmph. no mood to post nice things, bleah.

bye!

Hm?

2010-05-19T01:52:00.001-05:00

I duno why.. I jus feel very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very
Xin ku. I duno how describe the feelin.. Is all so sudden.
I feel super terrible to Junling..
I feel super guilty of tellin her, i will and i can. She wans me to have confidence. She did her part in helpin me and makin me laugh.. Thanks. But all i could do for her is jus break promises, makin empty promises.. Im truly sorry..
Its hard bein in a class where alot i people are doin bettet than eu, sometimes what one says realli breaks eur heart, is always exams period that many people starts to...
I duno what to do, ya, study chi. I dropped alot in Chinese. 2 grades.. Its like almost jus pass.. And.. Though my chem improved alittle, all the others dr0p. Yes, eu might tell me ia only mid year, but do eu boe the feelin whereby eu are so high up in the sky and the next moment eu are in hell, do eu noe how it felt?? It sucks.
I had so much confidence in the amaths test, i did. I had so much confidence. I thght i would pass. Nv even give me E8 or D7, jus gv me a F9. Eu noe how it felt?its not abt Oh i failed again. Is the effort i placed into my amaths resultin other sub to go haywire. I kip quiet on my physics. I din wan to regret.. I practiced alot questionsZ and then?? What do i get? I failes amaths too.
Is jus feel soo.. I heard i went crqzy after mid year amaths paper 2 collection of scripts amd results. I feel soo.. I duno. My mind snap..
I am reali very sad ..

Pictures?

2010-05-16T07:28:00.004-05:00

Picture spam??? hahas, jus i feel my blog is very wordy, thats why.. HAHAHA!
random pictures taken out from random photos.
I PON 2 tuitions todayy. WHOAH! lawls. hahas.
Currently tokin to Gummy, Junling, and spammin her wif winks. cool uh.
I ll be very proud and happy to spamm eu too, Yul, jus no mood.
HAHAHAHA! Well, Junling is funny.
&& Yesterday was Sunny Unnie's bdae! hahas!
Happy Belated Birthday! (:
Unnie, Saranghaeyo!^^ Hwaiting!
Orrhkkays, i realise smth, everytime i use mobile to update is all chunk together,
but whenever i use the compuuter, the template looked so diff, i wonder why.
CURRENTLY, i have a spammer, miss LEONG YOKE HUEI, spammin my wall in facebook.
HAHAS! some people jus got nothin to do, dun worry, i will spam back. HAHA! wait till she is offlinw. then.. MUAHAHAHA!.
Okkays, imma from Mars. Kinda funny, i like the word "very" now. as eu can see, my post on fb almost all had very. VERY's spam. HAHAHAS!
Thank you very very very very very very very very much. hahahs.
Type on ipod faster, the keyboard smaller. Hahas.

kkays, its gettin late, tmr got sch. Nah, imma not goin to sleep, jus goin to bathe and then watch my hello baby snsd. HAHAHAHA! ssshhhh. i noe eu miss me, but gtg. BYYEE! (:

- imma super high todayy, no idea whyy. (:

2010-05-15T00:54:00.002-05:00

Me and Tricia.

Me and Yoke Huei

I love my bear.

!@#!@#!@!# she kip naggin me abt my physics. eu nv see me study kip sayin dun hv. WTH!

#- Duno what to blog lah..

Hahahahahahahaha!

2010-05-14T02:19:00.001-05:00

Im very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very veryvery very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very veryvery very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very happy...

I am smilin !!! Not....
Orrhkkays, i am very sad..
1. Eng paper 2 - :(
2. Chem- :/
3. Chi paper 2 - :/
4. Chi paper 3- (:
5. Physics - :((

- Im a epic failure..

OVER? NOT OVER?

2010-05-14T02:13:00.001-05:00

Lets see,
MONDAY...
- physics and emaths paper 2
Emaths was okayyyy. Physics, kkays la. Cnt say easy nor can i say difficult. So so. Regretted nt studyin enough for it co i dun like it. Haix, now mus like it. :(
TUESDAY...
- woke up super early, went to market then walked ard the area, stroll to Serangoon for tuition. Haha. I say i wan milk tea, Joontong realli go buy!! Hahaha! Thanks! I gt pay him back lah. Hahas! Stayed quite long. ;x then home then go another tuition. Homed. Bathe. Onlined. Zzz.
WEDNESDAY...
- today lah, bascially... Lawls. Okayy. Amaths... Okay la. So so oso. I dun dare make any judgement, only brings back disappointment niah. Joelynn is right man! Tmr mus brin tissues, sur disappoint one. :x then went to mac wif yokehuei and mum. Slackes home onlined played fanned watched. Whatever.. Blah. Cnt believe i acTUalli got to urge to study when exams is over, when got exams feel like playin. When over, wan to play. I siao liao.

Orhkkays, whyy do i not hve the feelin of exams are over? It feels like... Nth. As in nth at all. Like exams? Over? Realli? Isit becos O level chi is jus a few weeks away or i had lost confidence?
I realise that i am afraid of tmr. In hall leh, like lawls. Finally can have a proper sleep leh. Hahahas!

Disappointment will find its way to me tmr. I jus hope... I will hope and i mus hope and... Sry for the tears i shed if i were to, for the next 3 days. I noe eu dun like to see it, neither do i like to cry. But im disappointed..

OVER? NOT OVER?

2010-05-12T09:11:00.001-05:00

2010-05-09T10:20:00.001-05:00

Todayy is Mother's day. Well, to all mama out there. Happy Mother's Day.

I have a feelin like i long tye nv update le. When i jus updated on Thursadyy. Well, LEFT 3 PAPERS TO GO! like Emaths paper 2 , physics n amaths paper 2.

Well to start of, lets say abt the papers we had and my thoughts towards it. Shall we?

Eng paper 1- okayy! Happy!
Eng paper 2- so so lah. Hahas.
Chi paper 1- damn proud of what i wrote, like totalli!
Chi paper 2- hell man! Wth!
Chi paper 3- cool. Fun. Can pass.
Social Studies- i havn write finish siah. One essay leh. What the freak man!
Chemistry- Wahlao! So difficult! Manage to get some answers right, but i hope to Ace it, my only 2nd strong subject.
Emaths Paper 1- way cool, jus hope i got no careless mistakes. Wont score so well as i expected cos after comparin answers i realised i have some doubts in my answers. :x
History- same lah! I havn write finish. I still gt half an essay to go. And hor, is take out frm the assignment book siah. So cheap lah! Wth!
Amaths paper 1- GO DIE MAN! FAIL ALREADY! i cnt say its difficult nor can i say its easy. I got awhole like of confidence when i do the paper, i was thinkin, eh, i can do leh. THE ONLY AMATHS PAPER i actualli have only 2 blanks! Improvement! I place in those efforts. Those tyes i prepare myself of this paper. I got some much confidence. Once aft the paper, went out of hall, many students started to compare answers. Then its feel like arrows shootin to me, my answers different from them. My answers like nt same wif them. I duno whether i will pass cos still gt paper two. And i doubt it will be so easy for us. Like i forget who say, he say paper 1 is jus testin basic skills... I wanna get 70 marks for paper 2 which i think i can continue dreamin abt it man..

Well, yah, hahas. Depressin huh. And i dun understand Physics and i havn practice maths. T.T i wanna cry liao. Haizzzz!!! :( and i am still postin. Well, someone knock me out!

Faster lah!

2010-05-06T09:12:00.001-05:00

Walao, jus get it over and done wif! Amaths is so freakin idiot.
History better.
Fear and suspicion
- durin the period of the purges, ppl were encourged to inform on their fellow workers, their neighbours and family members if they made any comments against Stalin or the Soviet Union. There was much fear and suspicion. As no evidence was needed for an arrest, anyone who had a grudge could get rid of another person by denouncing him to the NKVD. The NKVD would often take people away from their homes in the middle of the night or in the early hours of the morning. Thus, many Russians were afraid of answering the door at night because they assumed that the NKVD had come to take someone away.
- Mass executions
Mass graves were discovered throughout Russia after Stalin died. It is estimated that more than 20 million Russians were victims of the purges. As a result, Stalin became extremely powerful. No one dared to oppose or challange him. Those who had been purged were removed from any photographs and paintings they had appeared in. The old heroes of the Revolution were forgotton. From the 1930s until his death in 1953, Stalin was the only leader that mattered.

Hahahhas!! But anyway~ jus a small and short update.

我明白

2010-05-05T10:11:00.001-05:00

我知道有些事情过了就算。但是有些事情虽然过了但是却望不了。但是凡事都能解决的。相信我也要相信自己。

Monday or tuesday?

2010-05-03T12:34:00.001-05:00

Hehe! Time now 1:28AM. Hehes..

I cnt sleep.. Hahas! Been bothered by many things like studies.. Which course to take and which sch to go.. I fear abt mid year though... Hahahas. I jus wasted my whole monday wasted away and i hvn done studyin.. Shit. Im in dead meat... I truly am afraid... And im still on thr internet! How great...

Is eu are confusin me boy, i dun understand eu at all.. I realli do wish to understand eu. Eu nv gv me that chance.. I wanna try! Jus why dun eu let me try? Dun focus on only me. Eu too boy! :( i realli do love eu... Truly. Frm the bottom of eur heart. ( friends, is nt a bgr thing. Is a personal thinz. Dun ask me abt it )

Hahas

2010-05-02T11:54:00.001-05:00

I realise simply things like misunderstandings and cause alot of things.. Hahahas. It all over now. (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAREST MICHELLE CHENG!
16 uh! Old liao hahaha! I gv eu a long tag huh. Haha! All the best in everythin. Thanks for always supportin me! Givin me advice. When i needed help, God gave me eu. Eur blurness often make me laugh~ okay. Hahaha! I noe that eu noe that i noe that eu noe that eu are a friend i nv want to loose. Eu will always be my front-sit partner! Last long wif eur romantic bf. And May God bless Eu. Stay pretty. For that eu noe, eu are loved by me. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ONCE AGAIN TO EU. and enjoy eur day~ (;

Well, yupps, its 3rd March, 12.53am. (;
Haha. Just now, nope yesterday. Was okay. Super at tuition cox of vic. I will nv be sad again. I promise and i hope this pronise will last and will not break. I and her okay le. But it still takes a dew days dor the posts to be push to the bottom. Anyway, me bein a daily blogger, shld be able to do it. Haha~ i want go sleepin ltr. Hahaha. I mean after i sleep and wake up. Well, i am goin to fly to lala's land liao. Byee!

Eu, yes eu, i am smilin, becos of eu(:

Im a bad person

2010-05-01T11:21:00.001-05:00

Well, eu have done what eu wan to do. Eur main purpose. Make me feel bad so i cnt do well for midyear?
Right, everything was entirely my fault.
I was the one who interpret eur blog wrongly.
I was the one who started to ignore eu on PURPOSE, like eu say.
I was the one who contridict myself.
I was the one who backstab.
I was the one who hurt people.
I was the one who posted things that eu dun like.
I was the cause of everythin.
Eu wanted to see this right? This is what eu wan right? Eu have been tryin to get rid of me right? Ever since, IRSDM exsist. When eu wanna include jinxuan eu wanna me out of the clique. Shortly, when we rename wif cinyee and yokehuei, then becox diff class, becox of eu dun like cy. The clique disband. Ever since then we become hi bye friends. So? Did eu even bother? No use postin all how i feel all this. Cos to EU, what i feel isnt important at all, jus what EU FEEL is what that is IMPORTANT uh. Eu say eu wanna stop, why do eu read my post and reply back? I din say i wanna stop so i went to read eur post and reply. Eu said eu wanna stop and haha. Eu posted back. Again and again. I put wirds into eur mouth? I gt nothin better to do? Yes, what i say is all a lie. Eu did nth wrong, nth at all. All me. I am the bad one. I am the cause of everything.
Eu want to make me cry and so eu will bottle up and celebrate. Yeah, eu did it. I am already feelin bad abt what i posted, maybe is overboard, i am still concern abt did i say it too harsh. Did i say it too hurtful? editin my post. Tryin to make it sound okay. Eu say its rude, nvm i post another wan. But each time i see eur pist, i got so damn freakin upset. Gettin to noe eu treated me as eur real friend and backstab me in sch. Eu said i did it on purpose. Eu din respond to my callings in sch when eu were in class. Eu dun reply my msn. Eu emphasize on eur blig as if i got TWITTER i mus let eu noe. (i dino eu gt TWITTER, until meihui told me) wht am i? A maid? To report which accounts i have? Forget it, anyways to eu, WHAT I THINK IS JUS JUNKS, my feelings all this. Eu jus noe eu got hurt by me, nv once eu find out how deep i am hurt by eu. I, Kimberly, hereby inform eu that to eu i am jus nothin, but eu are more important. Eur feelin, what eu think, what eu post. Like always. Its positive. To eu, i am the harsh one, the rude one, the wrong one, the selfish one. To eu, i better be gone. Eu dun trust me. So whats the point of sayin eu dun wan spoil this friendship? This friendship, i, bein the selfish one in eur eyes like always, i dun wan it. Since eu said eu treasure it, hahaha, since when? Eu nv wanted to end this. Eu nv wanted. Eu jus want to make it worst so in the end i am the bad one like always.

I am smilin. I am i am i am i am i am.... Am i? Why am i cryin? Why? I shld be happy. Ahh. Jwhjwyhsdkondioej...

Lol!

2010-04-30T23:01:00.001-05:00

Itsn't so nice of eu to call the shots and the quits? Everythin started from eu, make me vomit all out then eu got nth to say cos maybe eu done all those things. then jus say eu wanna stop. If thats the case, what the hell are eu thinkin. People make mistakes what. Eu tell me eur mistakes, i tell eu eurs. Eu said eu nv wanted to throw away this friendship. Ej are now. Super contridictin. I nv even say eu are tokin rubbish. Sorry lah, people eng lousy. Eu wanna care? ITS EU ARE THE ONE WHO WAN TO STOP THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL AND THROW THIS FRIENDSHIP AWAY. EU MADE THIS DECISION. DUN REGRET! Eu nv ever wanted this friendship eh, why am i so bothered over it. I shld have known frm the start, if there is no trust, why shld i even bother? I have no idea why i even post it now. fake. Words are words, there are only words!
Come on Kimberly, eu saw it, didnt eu, eh saw it. The first post she said it until like dat? Polite? My ass. Then she contridict herself on the second one. Dun mind it Kimberly, stay focus, she din want this friendship AT ALL.

Words

2010-04-30T11:14:00.001-05:00

HELLO! pls dun mind my post. Haha! (:
Well before that, chinese paper 2 was damn sucky arh! Wth! Do until i *faint. No la, haha! (: paper 1 and 3 still okay lah. I like wan the papers back leh. Hha. Lol. But mus wait until 13 may! Haix... I am pretty angry after the second paper! Sorry to those who seen my teared and thanks! (: i noe i shouldnt everyone was one the same boat... Esp eu... Sorry dude! (: after that, walked home with Charles and Yokehuei. Then studied chem! YAY! haha! Lol! Went tuition, SUPER FUN CAN~ Hahas, Joontong admitted he wore pink, but denied it was pink but it was reddish-pink! Hahas~ funny. Dine out wif him and bro. While my bro play his PSP, Joontong and I talked alot about things. Haha! What did we say? *Secrets* LOL! jus now, he told me abt Lizards. Like eeew. Saw Clarissa(?), she gv us a shock! Haha! Hi there! Right... Then reached home at 9 plus~ bathed! Then onlined. T.T , my msg exploded, thanks to SOMEONE.

Speakin abt that someone, well, i, too, got alot to say. Not jus eu, and I THOUGHT eu noe that i will surely post back. So eu wanna say it on the net, fine wif me..
I THOUGHT I THOUGHT I THOUGHT. (: All was frm MY point of view. did i ever say, Pj say she dun care? And eu are tellin me that eu NV SAID I DUN WAN TO CARE ANYMORE? Well said, well said. Angry? Now eu feel the anger? What abt when eu neglected us( zihui,meihui,yokehuei,me) i bet eu dun even noe okays, thats why eu said eu dun even noe what eu did. Whats wrong wif me? Prefectly fine? My body parts are still intact and i aint sufferin frm any illness, jus so eu noe. Its useless? Yeah, how dumb of me to wan to stop these thing, should have jus let it continue? Great job, izit ? Sendin msg of 8 plus worthed msg, even though i noe it will exceed my limit, i still press the sent button. Even though i knew how much i have to pay wif my own money, i took the courage and time to send to eu. My msg is contridictin? If eu realli noe me, like eu say eu treated me like a REAL friend, eu shld have noe that i am NOT GOOD in expressin myself. Din eu asked me on msn? I explained? Or did eu jus simply heck care. Eu are tryin to imply that eu cared abt our friendship? Well done, eu have done it, AFTER CCA. great, i din allow eu guys to step into my heart? Did eu even try? Did eu even ask? Did eu even care or bother? Or jus sit there and wait for me to come to eu? Like a dog. I bet eu are jus waitin. I nv let people hv a chance to step into my heart, how come people can do it? Me findin excuses? It takes one to say one uh. I guess eu are jus tryin to say that i am not like meihui who come and find eu, eu are jus blamin me? Me selfish? Me attitude? Yeah, i noe my attitude sucks sometimes. Eu are disgusted and irritated by my actions? Oh, what abt eu when eu are in a bad mood? Give people that face and like everyone owes eu a livin. Get closer to someone else then neglected eur other friends? She tok to eu and eu din even reply to her, she waited for eu to go history and treat it as she is surpose to do it?! Pls lah, eu nv give people attitude meh? When ppl tok to eu, eu din even bother to reply. Disgusted? I nv say anythin for the past one year le okay. Everytime is always us bein left out, us. Tried to blend in, and what do we get? 'eu cnt noe one' eu wan whisper into other people's ear dun do it so openly if there is another person there, do eu noe how that person feels? Eu nv told us of infact ME abt eur things too, maybe yes, only that that, when I CALLED eu huh. Yes, that tye. I tok to eu and yea, afterthat, no more. Eu din neglect us? Well i have a few examples, abt that tye when we were doin Flag day? We said have lunch together. Yeah, eu said eu waitin for Grace, yeah, we waited, eu nv tell us abt tokin to Miss Chew, FYI, eu shld noe that zihui's aunt will scold her de, well, we(yh,mh, zh and i) waited outside the bloody staffroom for hw long? Eu said sry arh, make eu wait so long, okay, nvm, walked out of sch. Then? We tried to tok to eu, then?? Nth, eu jus kip on tokin abt the class thing, yeah, since we are in different class, we cnt help much. We jus kip quiet. AND, eu all were walkin so slowly, dun eu noe how hungry we were?eu din even say,' eu all go first or eu all hungry mah?' things like that, well nvm, i dun realli care abt whether eu asked or not, i am not so petty uh. Do eu noe why yokehuei left early? Becos she was pissed. I think zihui too. Meihui, being nice decided to follow eu guys. And? Did eu include her in eur conversation? I duno. I was pissed so i went wif Michelle, then what do i get? ' oh, she is closer wif them?' HELLO? THE TIME I WASTED WAITIN FOR EU, I DIN EVEN SAY A SINGLE WORD AND UNTIL MRT STATION EU STILL SAY EU DUNO WHAT TO EAT. fine. I walked off. Eu din noe. No, eu dint. And abt meihui, i will not get angry abt her showin eu my tweets, so? Whats the big deal? Twitter is public and soon eu will eventualli noe de wht. Why shld i hide it? I oso nv block it or what, see then see lah, there is nothin to be angry abt. Eu said i changed? Cos eu duno me at all. Yeah, i have changed from sec2 to sec3. And yeah, i am not so petty or whatsoever. I wont get angry because of TWITTER? eu said eu cried for nights?sry abt that. Whatever i said, eu dun believe, then what hurts me? Eu din even noe how hurt i was or we were and eu count eurself how many times have eu trusted me? Well, eu nv knew how upset i was last year becox of eu. And eu dun even noe what the hell eu did. My current friends? Oh i simply jus love them ttm! Even though MAYBE they dun like me. But why would they? Jealous? Like i care? They are ones who taught me how to become strong again whenever eu add salt to my wounds? So eu only noe eu get hurt. Not others around eu. How great can that be.. I am selfish? Think abt eurself, yeah, i am selfish becox i dun wan to share some of my things cox its personal, eu shld noe like eu said eu treated me like a REAL friend, that when i want to say i will say de. Dun eu noe by now? Oh? I am double-sided? How abt eu? Pretend to be friends and then backstab people? Did i even say anythin abt eu when eu neglected our existance?did i even mutter a word? And becos i dun respone to eu a month back, its like a big thing. Eu told them that i treated eu like a robot, spare tyre? HAHA, eu are not treatin me as a robot? As a spare tyre? Are we floatin woods on the ocean ? So when eu feel like hangin on to it then hang? If not swim far far away? So how many times eu have backstab me and eu said' i treated u like a real friend' contridictin? Real friends=backstab? Wonderful! People out there, if eu treat eur friends as real friends, backstab them. Isit what eu are tryin to brin across? If eu realli wan to settle this asap, no matter how busy eu are , eu will still try, when i saw eu say other day then tok, i was shocked and it shows me how eu treated me as? REAL friend, i get it. So i admit i am sensitive towards the ' when will eu stop mixin wif them?' thing, so? Does it hurt to be sensitive? I bet eu duni how sensitive i am. And i din even say i am clever or what? Which part of my sms did i state that i am clever that i have found out eu are talkin abt me? abt the' this few years are nothin compared to that one year, so this is how eu feel, i get it' thing? On purpose? Oic, what for purosely put for me to see? When eu din even treat me as a friend, someone eu value? Yeah, eu jus sit there and EXPECT us to come and look for eu, tok to eu, why isit always us but not eu ? So i have to come and look for eu in order to let eu treat me as friend? Or eu jus simply see me then shout my name? Did eu ever come and find us? NO! is always the opposite. And that was aperiod of time when eu dun wan go recess, then? Expected us to go over? Who is the selfish one? Me? I think meihui is bein very kind already huh, although she din say it. She felt this way too last year but idk now. So what are eu goin to say now?' becox of such LITTLE THINGS, kimberly is angry at me, thanks for being frank.' and eu nv called us out to study okay? Until zihui found out and eu still say how eu noe de? Whoah! Although, me and zihui and yokehuei cant often go out, eu could at least ask what. We actualli can go out sometimez. Eu din realise or maybe eu did that i have been goin out to study wif yokehuei , my friends or go out wif them uh? Eu din even asked and eu jus simply thought that oh, we cnt go out so why bother askin? Realise that now? Too late.
Yeah, i looked forward to eur arguement against my post. Cox not only are eu angry but me too and eu said until like its a big time for neglectin eu for past few weeks when eu eurself did it to us in a year.

Well, that is what happen recently, dun ask me what happen. I will not say, i hope eu people will respect my decision?cox isy own prob! (: thanks for the continuous support.
<>

Bbyee~
Hey, jiayous, its only chi MYE, eu still gt one month! (;

One down! Six to go!

2010-04-29T09:09:00.001-05:00

Todayy, English paper was doable. Not say easy nor was it very hard.. Haha! Tmr is chi, damn it lah. Stressed... :(

Take a break(; then do chem homework for tuition, went to tuition oh! I realli tok alot to joon tong hor! HAHA! fun though~ we managed to do work too! Tmr mus concentrate more leh! Haha!

Tmr is chi paper~ gtg now!

I like the smile in eur faces! Smile more ok friends! (;
Hehehe! Jiayous for the papers!

Startin soon

2010-04-28T10:27:00.001-05:00

Ooh! Mid year is startin soon in 35min tye. HAHAHA! cool! I am waitin to hear the time's up at the last paper! Well, this year is in the hall! Sooo... Hahahaha. Gtg and sleep le! Must sleep early today. Although is quite late le!
Jiayous everyone! (:

Mi mi mi do do do la la la so so so -.-"

2010-04-27T08:52:00.003-05:00

HEHEHE! im high today yet abit upset and angry.
Gastric came and visit me after sch today. Cnt ta han man. Very pain ! Thanks Claire for the medicine. (Eu cheer up girl. Its not worth cryin over it! Smile~)
English remedial, lalala~ haha! Rained. Grr, went home when its drizzlin. Went meet victoria at bus stop and Jiarui at hub to pass him his book. Then went tuition. Wah, grastic damn irriatatin this tye, wan make me vomit. Argh! Quickly buy things eat. Now better le.. Idk why but today gt alot of insects flyin ard the lights at central. EEEWWWWWW! i managed to not scream wheb it flew near me, i ran. Lol! An idiot runnin ard uh! Yeah, i think thats me. Bused home~ haha. Alone. Vic went to dinner to celebrate advance mother's day. HAHA! exams are round the corner. Hehehe. I mus be self-discipline uh.

. eu dun wan it so be it. I am not goin to care, not goin to do anythin abt it. If eu jus think everythin is my fault,i ..hve no comments. Aint eu oso at fault too? I admitted and eu? Tryin to act innocence and ignorance to what happen? Eu said its sudden, ...yeah, eur attitude change ISNT sudden at all right? Eu cared? I wonder when eu actualli treated me as eur friend? I am sorry if i hurt eu ....here.. What eu said and did have hurt me more than this. Eu din realise? Yeah, obviously not. Eu dun understand what i meant and eu .....find it to shallow to be sincere. So be it. Whatever i wan to say, i have said. Is only up to eu to believe uh. My guess if eu still have ......doubts. Haha. Then eu dun understand me at all. Neither do i . Since it is so tirin what for continue it? Eu saw me, eu purposely walk .......away, as if i am blind. Great. If thats what eu wan. Since our friendships is unstable and has no trust.
Grrrrrr. Pissed. Attituded. -.- HAHAHAHA! Gtg nw.

TRANSFORMATION COMPLETE!

2010-04-25T02:32:00.002-05:00

Shalalala~ i love playin games wif my cousin. So funny! Haahas! Well, i have to go tuition latr! Hahas! Goodie!

Transformation is complete! Yayness! HAHAHA! goodie goodie. (: i love those who helped me thrgh yea? (: cos eu guys were there for me. No matter how busy eu guys are. (: thank you. Esp to Junling, Michelle, Wanying, Donavon and Khairi. Of cos, Corin, Ryan, Melody, Vic, Do, Joelynn..Lots more. (: thanks alot! Love love! Eu guys are the best.

edited ;

Went tuition. Chem was fun~ HAHA!
Heart to heart talks with __________________________.
I am still waitin for eur replies! (:

I hope everythin would be okay. Realli..

Peace out- bed time

2010-04-23T11:20:00.001-05:00

Gee.
I have no idea what to post. I jus click on the update button. Then whoah! Why did i create a new post? ...
Zzz...
Zzz...
Cnt rmb. Then i shall go to sleep! (:

Edited;
Now i rmb.
School was okay today except mornin, darn. Hehes! I dk whats happenin but idc. Wahaha! Had some fun times durin physics. Was playin games with wei wei and huimin. Lunched over with mates at opposite. James damn funny~ i think Junling's hand is goin to drol when we were goin up the stairs. Chi remedial, oh well, gt it over and done wif. Geog! I am nt a geog student. Waited for yh. Mr lee is super lou shuo. Lol! Haha!
Tuition cancelled due to weather conditions. If problem persist, pls dial LOL to confirm the rain nowadays contain acid rain.

Oooh! Gonna plan a outin! Pri sch outin. Immediately aftet O levels! Miss them so much! It had been years eh.

[ i gonna let everytin go, everytjin, and see if it helps. ]

Zzzz..

Whats wrong?

2010-04-21T11:39:00.001-05:00

Background music : Hero (m.c.)

I duno whats wrong wif me.seriously.. I tried to be happy, everythin, i tried my best. I duno if my worst fear is confirmed.. What if mr lee was right abt mrs singh? How? What am i suppose to do? Face the reality? I dun wan to be labelled as 'm.i' eu noe. I think no one does. People think that i am lyin abt bein sad all these but they always see me laughin, but the truth is, i smile and laugh to hide my tears. I dun wan to continue bein like this. Its drainin my energy away. Alot of my energy away. And i aam startin to feel that its gettin worst.. I dun wan to go to the c. I am afraid. But i am more afraid that through all these, i will not be able to perform well in my studies. mid year is exactly one week. And i have all these things and to add on, i am still in the mist of breakin down. I am afraid that this fall is so strong that i have no strength to carry myself up... I used to hurt myself by s.And it feels so numb and the pain goes away. Isit right for me to try it again? I duno. Cox i realli duno whats the hell wrong wif me. I am like consistently givin prob to people esp D... And now mre people who actualli offered to help me are bein dragged down the water. I think tht it is a serious mistake in noein me, i aint a good friend or what.. I am so damn emotional, every post is alnost the same... I kip repeatin myself. I am totalli stressed out. Totalli. Sometimes i jus wish i flunk myself out the W. Maybe i will go back to S.idk.. I duno what to do.

I feel so depressed... I wish i have a penknife now..

I am a robot.

2010-04-20T10:25:00.001-05:00

I think i dun nid to sleep tonight le, manage to grab sometime usin iPod yo update. I realli nid some ventings.

Fack stress, fack stressed. I truthfully admit i duno whats the hell wrong wif me. Its 8 days left to exam from tmr and i cnt still break down. How prefect! i interally wanted to dash out of the history room that moment but i stubbornly held it back. And fack, it went out if control in class. Jus so freak, showin my weak side. Esp in front of ... Nvm. Omgosh freak la. Haix. Whats done is undone. Theb suddenly veey high, WAY COOL! -.- fack! Then chem, camp booster(?). Lol! Hahs! Quite OK lah. Then remedial for eng, rush back home and then changed oit and rush out for tuition. Was late. Double fack! Then after that, rushed back home, did homework. And bloody hell fack! When will i complete? Tmr is chem test for me, i havn revise, physics, havn revise, chi nt done, eng not done. Maths, laggin at the bottom of Mt. Everest. Great, and continuin be like that for the few days, i will be sick and then lag again. Whats the big deal?? Fyi, midyear is nxt fri. Thrice fack! Grrr! I am so jakekiwmpgsblxialarkOKhgajosnzdjjzdnzuenajnk !!

Idk what's wrong wif me, i wanna cry everythin out. Everythin, but i cnt. I am in a condition whereby i dun even noe if i will survive the next minute. So whats the big deal if i din do well in chi? I have times when i am losin grip of myself...
I am a human too. A human who needs rest. And i have been burnin midnight oil for the past few weeks. And damn it, o is near. I am still at the edge of breakin down. How wonderful can i be?

*dun even be surprise if i teared the next few days. Cos i reallu cnt control myself. And i dun like it..

A flaw?

2010-04-17T11:07:00.001-05:00

Im abtta burst- everythin, the prssure is jus soo not describable..
I am jus gonna be who i am and i aint eur toy, for eu to push ard. For eu to kick and order around. Take it as i am blind. Everythin, IT MY FAULT! MY FAULT IN MEETIN NEW FRIENDS, MY FAULT TO NOT TALKIN TO EU, MY FAULT IN NOT CARIN FOR EU, MY FAULT IN WHAT? everythin eu think i am in the fuck fault.

Great i jus sin...

Changed of moods in one day

2010-04-16T10:23:00.001-05:00

Prefect, i am back to bloggin. Addictions. Firstly, i would like to thank Khairi, Justin, Ryan, Corin, Huiling and many more, for jus nw, when i first online-d. Thanks, i almost cried when i tok to them..

Okay, Chi remedial was Hahahaha!... nOT. Hahas! So long and i wanna sleep and there arr some noise pollution around, can hear the teacher, e.g. Motors of vehicles! So noisy. Still got more. Hahash! Then physics spa is like uh! Very diff answers .... Hahas! Then wanna sleep. Hahas! I duno what am i typin almost. Then horrhs, is eng, funny . I gtg like ! I wannna sleep!

I got a feelin, its a long day~

2010-04-15T09:54:00.001-05:00

I hold the gun, you shoot

Well, eng starts off the day. Mrs singh is damn funny~ she can lead to anywhere whatever what the hell she is tokin abt. Zhibo gv a presentation for 15 mins. He did make us laugh alot. Inside joke. HAHAHA! today physics super borin. Hahas! Then maths, i am quite surprise that mr lee kip jumpin off topic today~ VE was borin though. Slacked a while, wanted to find pj. She gt lesson. Then after that, went home, bathe. Went out for tuition. Met xinying at theac there. Then wemt for tuition. Halfway thrgh, the sky gt grummpy and annoyin, i am afraid of the bolt sound uh. Then raines. Perfect, how do we go home? Good idea. In the end, my umbrella spoil, wet la, totalli drenched, and perfect, the bus is air-con-ed. Ate dinner, then went for tuition. Backed. Bathe. Rest.

MYE is comin, i feel so stressed out by everythin, my failure in maths, had brought my confidence into hell.how many days away towards mye? 2 weeks. How many days to Os? Less than 200 days. Its comin, realli very soon, studies... What can eu do to be successful, doesnt realli care eur marks eh. I realli hope i can pass siah. The mock tests not back yet. And i am very afraid..

Life is tough~

Tired and more tired and eventually alot of lack of sleep thingy..

2010-04-14T09:51:00.001-05:00

lives is soooo not fair, think abt the things, eu say before makin conclusion. Who's the one triggerin everythin? And its eu. God noes it all. Its a din.

Eng oral totalli flunk. Argh! Have to battle tomorrow. AHA! will be fun i guess.
Hahas, had ss mock test, pe, history, recess , maths, eng. Awww man! Hall simply sucks! Soo hot! And i stammble all the way, awww man! I think alot ppl oso. Hahas. Went to foyer, slack lah, chat argh! Lol, hahas! Fun fun~ did some socializin. Well, kinda link to diff stuffd that eu readers could nv image. Hahahs! Shall not say, inside joke inside joke. Esp Joontong's. HAHA! Went home wif yokehuei. Told her only a small thing then she cnt stop laughin! Then went home, dined, changed, rolled to tuition. I can barely kip my eyes open when doin physics. Whoah! After a bathe, i am refresh, no no, sooner or later i will still sleep de. Hahas!

its the 2nd time, eu tried to brin me away, pls, dun let me fear eu, let me love eu, brin me back to eur side after i am done wif every single thing in my entire life. I still have a long way to go. pls, Father.

Special thanks to BRANDA HO for _____. and Minling, Wenning, Corin, Haily, James and more. (:

I pass though. Thanks And sorry to Jiarui. (:

I will try but there is fear, fear to noe whats wrong wif me, fear to noe if i have anythin else. Why mus i make such decisions? I am only 15. I still have 85 years more to carry on. Dun let me decide soo early. Pls~ :(

Monday oh! 1st day of steppin down.

2010-04-12T04:55:00.003-05:00

IF SKY'S THE LIMIT, WHY ARE THERE FOOTPRINTS ON THE MOON? STRETCH EURSELF, EU WILL NEVER NOE HOW FAR EU CAN GO IF EU ARE PULLIN EURSELF BACK. BELIEVE IN EURSELF AND EU WOULD BE ABLE TO ACE IN EVERYTHIN. CONFIDENCE IS THE KEY.

Blockquote is realli meaningful~ someone told me this. Well, title says it all. Today is offically the first day of CCA step down. HAHAS, i went to disturb though and everyone made me felt welcome, hehehe. Not implyin at anythin, jus maybe they miss me too much~ LOL! Kiddin.

'This is realli a very easy chapter' I heard over and over again in maths lesson today. Whoah! can eu at least have any respect to those who is weak in maths?

Today, we had an interestin day. Well, at least for me, cos somehow the sch decided not to have half-day and they start the mornin by introducin the band/s success to the sch. Right, doin the cheer in the mornin, realli kips me awake. HAHAHA. DEYI is the best, kays, we dun nid eur comments, eu are jus so sore. get it? FULL STOP. well, chem lesson, blah blah blah, maths, wow! at least not amaths, emaths still manageble for people like me wif weak amaths skills. Then physics, well, BLAH BLAH BLAH, physics is always borin though, never once interestin, well maybe have, yes, there is, SPA, the one when he introduced electricity current of somethin like that, yeah eu noe which one, out of these lesson we had, we come to a point where everyone agreed that THAT SPA lesson is the most interestin lesson, what have Physics done to us? -.- i have forgotten what is next... YEAH, rmb-ed, SS, it took so long for Mr.Goh to come, HAHA! recessed wif Yokehuei, Meihui, Victoria, Tansi and Amanda( i haven seen her for ages ), maths again, guess mr lee is on good mood today eh, HAHAHA! then English, hahahs, the picture oral thingy was fun~ hahas, the picture on the screen and the one that we looked at, is a HUGE DIFF. HAHAHAS! maths again and then chi, total boredom. sick of chi olready, super thanks to the lots of homework given by the remedial teacher. haiz. mus not thnk this way uh! Then DISMISS<>

WHOAH! CONGRATS MY DEAREST JIA QI, TRYIN OUT CHOIR PRESIDENT EH! eu can do it de! dun worry, girl! (: i believe in eu! (: i love euuuuuu! (: lucks to Annabelle and Jason, Cindy, Vanessa Lin, Vanessa Goh and Ilin. (: JIAYOUS!

"If life is so tough, why are people unwillingly to give up and fight for
survival?"

DMB SYF

2010-04-10T11:37:00.001-05:00

I think almost everyone knew, Deyi won! Soo damn obvious~
THE PERFORMANCE WAS DAMN NICE! SUPPER EXCITIN! THE MAZE WAS SUPEER HIGH!!! (; the band had done it! Great man! (: DEYI MBAND GOT ALL AWARDS, THE GOLD WITH HONOURS, THE BEST DRUM MAJOR AND THE BEST DISPLAY BAND!

Bowen sec was nice too! Their performance was damn cool. Congrats on the Gold wif honours! (:

On the way back , then smth happen make me damn pissed! Sorre loserrrrrr laaa.

BAND WAS SUPER GREAT! kinda of regret switchin cca.. Step down le. Hahahahas! (:

Friday oh!

2010-04-09T10:28:00.001-05:00

Time check! 11.11 pm now.
Nidda sleep! Hahas!

Offically stepped down frm cca. All the hard work paid off, everythin. The performance we had, the first time i stepped up the stage, the last time i sang wif the choir. The first time i said hi to seniors , the last time i saud bye to the juniors. I joined at sec 2. So 2 years passed, thanks choir. Thanks mrs erp. Thanks choirmates. Thanks deyi. From lettin me pursue my dreams in future. Thanks. Everythin seemed so fast like yesterday. I missed those SYF fightin spirit, the laughter and shoutins we had. I will miss the choir market. Juniors, eu are on eur own now. Eu have to learn by eurself already. Good lucks.
I am sooo empty after steppin down. Like there is somethin missin... Hahahas! Shannon, take care, dun faint. Amanda, Audrina, Isabelle.. I will miss eu. Kelly, Felicia, Jasreen, Sophia, Vanessa GOh, Eileen, Vanessa Lin, Shi Shan, Liyanna, Annabelle, Jason, Cindy, Nicole... Seniors already! Work hard! (: love all of eu ttm! (: Dune, Ilin and esp my JiaQi.. I miss eu the most ah, jiaqi! Dune too! Lucks to ilin. Hahas!
Well, Ding Chao, Jun Hao, Ryan, Vivian, Joelynn, Joanna, Samantha, Jasmine, Ling Jing, Siti, Lara, Pui Ying, Janice, Pueh Suan, Jia Min, Si Min, Hui Ching, Michelle, Doreen, Mei Hui and me. (did i miss out anyone?) are offically stepped down. Lets strive and work hard for our upcomin examinations! Keep in touch! Lovee all of eu! (:

Night night. Zzzz

Thursday oh!

2010-04-08T11:07:00.001-05:00

Its Friday now i think.. Way past 12am. Anyways, jus treat it as thursday. (:
I realised i am addicted to blog. I blogged everyday huh.

Well, today I slept for the whole day in sch. Heheehe! Too tired! My eyes very pain oso.. Dunno whyy. Maybe i noe. Dun wan say leh. Bleah~ is becos i stayed up to study then forget to sleep...
Lol, the nxt moment i noe, its time to wake up! Lol! Nah. Not so kua zhang la. I slept in eng in physics in maths in VE. Offically awake at 12.30pm and felt sleepy again at 4pm. Whoah! What a long lifespan i have~ shld treasure it -.-
cca was okay lah, early dismissal leh. By 10mins. -.- so yeah. Went home and started doin chinese paper until 9plus and then 10plus start on bao zhang bao dao. Due to the topic, my brain is juiceless nw. Then started on letter duno when. Until now, i am bloggin~ HAHAHA!

I am super tired and i am afraid i will collaspe one day be it mentally or physically, cos i am sufferin from both. And i cnt though. 200days left to the major exam and i am still nt prepared ! I am so scare i will go crazy before 0s cos it is very stress abt the academic. Esp maths! Somehow i realli look forward to recieve the mock paper, either way, i will still go bongkas. And i havn do my amths homework.. I am freaked out...

Wednesday oh!

2010-04-07T08:58:00.001-05:00

Heey peeps,

Started out my day okay eif emaths test. 45 mins. Got music somemore! Hahha! I din complete T.T , can pass i very happy already! HAHAHA! (:
PE was MADNESS! Great that we dun nid to stay back after sch. But durin PE is kinda of rush.. HAHAHA! at least not under the hot sun~ next week PE is 2.4km! Omgosh! Hahaha! Have to wer runnin shoes if can... Grrr. Sch shoe very flat, then will injure the knee caps. HAHAHA!
Chem-ed. Then what arh. Oh! History. Cut cut chop chop. Eng lesson damn funny. Zhibo and mrs singh's debate session abt feelin and thinkin. HHAHA! Is quite -.- actualli... Hope tmr eng can get back mock eng papers. And maths if possible. Like suddenly wan to noe where i stand siah! Zoom zoom~ then i can catch up wif the rest of the class uh! Then hmmm... Slacked in class~~~ CHI ORAL! damn! Totalli flunk it. Stumble all the way. Kip mixin eng and chi into the conver. Shyt lah, i cnt tok well but can write onli siah, stupid leh. There goes oral~ the teacher din even looooooooooook at us. Oh well, unlucky bah. And the topic is like. Wtf. I duno how say de. Cox to me is okay la. BUT CNT POSSIBLY SAY IS OKAY LA TO THE TEACHER RIGHT? THEY EXPECTED EU TO SAYYY NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! oh gosh, oral is a goner. :X
Slacked in foyer, then went homeeeeee.
Eh! I did homework okay! Like homework! HAHAHA! how good can i be?!

I ammmmmmm soooo tired. I wannnaaaa sleeeeppp! I havnnnn batheeeeee!!! Toilet got my broooooo. Hurry up siah! Ltr i bathe half-way zzzzzz !

Zzzzz.

... ... ... ...

2010-04-06T08:22:00.001-05:00

Monday.

- had a serious break down durin cca. Maybe is becos i kip thinkin abt what jia rui had mumbled when he sat beside me for eng.. I dun blame him anyway. Is jus becos i like the think and think. Thats why i gt scared... When sing until halfway, i realise i cnt sing anymore. The fear and feelin choked me then i want to cry. Told jia qi, i cnt sing anymore.. Then i started cryin durin the break, haix... I cnt handle my emotions well. It has been botherin me for a long time. I should realli seek help...

Tuesday.
Damn it. Elearnin sucks.. I din even complete. Only completed maths and yesterday eng. Hahhas! Then sort of revise of tmr's mock exam.. Sians. Tmr pe is five station.. And chi oral... Sobs.. But there is somethin very happy that is
HAPPY ADVANCED BIRTHDAY TO LIM PEIJUN!!! (:
And ILING!(:
Hahahs!

Super stressed out at the place i sit in class. One day, i will burst... I guess..

Easter Day

2010-04-03T22:58:00.001-05:00

Whoah! Good mornin! Another 2 mins to noon~ (:

HAHAHAHA! (:

Yesterday, went to work then tuition, then went to popo's house~ slacked. Watched tv. Homed. Onlined. Play games. Stupid com, kip laggin. HAHAHA! i went to sleep ard 2am.

Today, woke up. Onlined again. Shyt me lah, another how many days left to MYE! Grrr. Hahahs! Later got tuition. Okay okay la. Can at least study oh~
I dun care, today i am goin to do SCIENCE. Dun care if he asked for maths!

Btw,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMES! (:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SENIOR, ADELINE! (:

Good Friday

2010-04-02T10:10:00.001-05:00

Surprisingly, i woke up at 9plus today. Wanted to sleep more.. ==
Did chem paper 1 . Can do 77.5% of the paper. That means 31/40 question. (; hahas, studied organic chem awhile then prepare to go church, wif cousin.
When we reached St.VINCENT De PAUL, it was ssoo crowded. In the end, we went to tge rooms for 'live' mass.
Ended ard 5 pm plus. I realli hope God would hear me.. (:
Went to Thomson Plaza wif family and grandma, 2nd aunt and ah koon kor kor and 5th aunt. Shopped ate walked. Then i bus to bishan when everyone homed. Bought some things(: then homed. Bathe. Quite late le. Tmr still gt work. Hehehe! Gtg, sleepy~ buai!

*note: my sms exploded, is not that i dun wan reply... I will reply if its urgent, call me instead! Dun sms!!! Thanks! (;

朋友到处都有，只是有没有选到好的朋友。

2010-03-31T08:56:00.001-05:00

CORIN TOO JIA HUI IS MY C.BUDDY! (cutie buddy!)
CHEW JUNLING IS MY L.BUDDY! (lovely buddy!)
RYAN TEO IS MY B.BUDDY! (bang bang buddy!)

Hahaha! I have 3 buddies and i love them ttm!! (: will have more, jus started the club today. Hahahs ! Wll definately have more. Maybe i will make into a list. Yay! (:

Thanks peijun.Lim. For cheerin me up, and eu are very lively wif James siah. Hahas! Thanks for the long tye eu pei me after sch. (: thanks! Love eu ttm!
Thanks James too. (: eu are one funny joker.

Thanks Alan, junyuan, waimei and jiarui. Thanks! (: and Alan, thanks! Eu made me laugh! (: hahas! (:

Thanks yokehuei for everythin eu had done. Hahas! Feel proud to have eur name here horrhs, eu blur queen. (:

Thanks Corin, Junling and Ryan for cheerin me up online. (: thanks alot.(:

Thanks those who made me smile and taught me things. (: thanks soo much.
Thanks eveeyone in my life who make me feel significant.

Thank eu very much my dearest friends!
-------------------------------------------------

Hahas ! I wanna thanks alot of people not on oline pages. Maybe when i change my plan. I slowly send, (;

Today.... Simply... Yeah. Dun wish to say much. But yeah jus like a normal day. Thanks peijun. Realli realli! (:

我已经不想再管了。
无论我怎么想，都与你无关。
我相信你不是笨的，我想你已经查绝我对你的态度大已有所改变。但是你却像一只打步死的蟑螂一样。只是丢人现眼罢了。

I wonder..

2010-03-30T09:30:00.001-05:00

Haix. A prefect day tmr.. With mock test, luckily eng, PE, beep test. And amaths. I should be studyin for Amaths noww. Guess what. I dun hv confidence. Jus lost most today... Thanks to someone..

Sent msgs out. If eu did happen to see here, for any readers, have an early rest today. Test in the mornin. And for those who got beep test comin up! Drink tons of. Water! Eat breakfast! HahS!

Jus the way it is. (: its only by then that eu understand. Love and hate. Can happen at both the same time. and its suffocatin. Its hard to let it go..

I hate eu. Dun fake. I noe eu noe i am tokin abt eu. Becos of eur fakin actions.

Eu and eur idiotic attuide.

2010-03-29T09:47:00.001-05:00

It sucks to see people have 2 sided-face .

Well, had the most borin cca day in sch. Dun even feel like goin. Lol. <:
-people make friends from who they are but not what they are and how they look.
It's surprisin to see people sticks to another when they got tired from the previous friends. What? We are the spare tyres ?? when they have their own friends, they neglect eu. When their friends were busy or they had conflicts, then those ppl would come and stick to eu. How nice? And always says, " no matter what, eu are still my beat friend." wow! Eu mean spare tyres best friend. ! fak. What a nice friendship eu have given us. We will rMb it well. Eu seriously think we are jus goin to let all things flow past? No, we are sick and tired of eur freakin attuide. Dun act one step lian, cos eur NOT. And eu aint fit to be one. O.o ~

People change, the world is changin too. Eu will nv find the ME in jan, feb or the years before, i grow up, experience things everyday and somethings bound to change me and my behaviour. I am not those who can stay like a good people everytime. Sometimes, eu jus have the play the mean one so that ppl wont get on top of eu. And its freakin idiotic to see the dacrastic change. Maybe eu din realise, i will hence tell eu, i changed everythin abt me. And i will not be hence affected by the past. No. Not anymore, try and provoke me and see what eu get. Step fak.

Ooh~ its monday today and yeaps, the weather is not doin any better so is my results. I hv actualli decided to give up, (: on maths. Yeah.

SILENCEEEEEEEEE! my DumbDumb wans to speak! (;

2010-03-28T09:49:00.002-05:00

Oooh, dearest! So nice of eu to say , " i cnt wait, wait for the sun to get up so i can go to sch to see eu! " HOW SWEET! (; ily! (;

HAHA! havn been postin aye. For just a few days, cnt resist the temptation to blog. Since the app is directly under my nose!!! Like so easy and fun and i am so tempted to press and logged in. I did. -.-/// well thats why, i am postin. And funny though, how long can the post get when i got nothin to post. Well, actualli got.

Friday's chi remedial, totalli craziness! I hate it. But it helps although alot of homework.
Sat, went tuition wif Joontong after my work. Ahaha! So funny. I thght joontong do maths, i do science, i can well, like skip the questions jimmy asks... And well, he askes me too. Cox he say, if i noe. Jt wont ask him. How cool. Showed as the game he played. I spammed all the way though. Went to grandma's house. Then korkor help me see the chi thingy and ss. And physics, although in the end is marvin kor kor help me de. Isabelle jie jie is super funny. Izaac dun sad, tom played bad wif eu though. Eunice came after watchin performance. HAHAH! i skipped evenin tuition today cox i have to complete all homework, although i din do physics. -.-/// Hahaha! And i am readin storybooks now. Wif songs playin and fingers on ipod updatin this blog! (; i can multi-task though. HAHAHAH!

Yuchelle, on hold!!!! Eu might fall , eu noe! Hahahha! Stupid biker! (: be caredul next tine idiot, traffic is dangerous! :@

Well, gtg and sleep , no, read finish my storybook le. Night night. (: tmr gt cca, dun wanna gooooo!! Bang! (: ( Ryan! I strike, headshot siah) (;

Run Devil Run

2010-03-25T09:15:00.001-05:00

What on earth?? I am bein 'scolded' by a sec one!!!! Damn!

- i love today after sch. Whatever time i had there, it kips me away from those worksheets and i love to talk to people. Hahas!!

- talked to mama, told her i wanna go to the sch we got to noe durin VE. Mama say no future , dun wan! I wan be on stage!!!! I wan degree of music ( vocal )
Haix... I shall try to presue my dream in any direction.

- hahas! I gtg slp, headache.

The Game of Life, and i am losin it..

2010-03-24T09:49:00.001-05:00

UNCONTROLLABLE REACTIONS.
And mostly experiencin serious moodswings.
- am i sick??

Why is everyone focusin me to do things i dun lye? Why is everyone tryin to make me feel left out? Why is everyone makin life difficult for me? Why am i always postin these emo posts? To whom or where can i rant on ? Realli tryin to stay strong and dependence like i promised. I cnt, i am sorry if i broke the promise.. I cnt i realli cnt. And its hurtin me alot alot. And causes me to go crazy. Doesnt mean that i am always smilin, i dun hv troubles, doesnt mean the tears i shred are tears of happiness. Doesnt mean that everything i do is what i am expected of. Aint i am human? Like any other people? I dun get that feelin that i am treated like a human. I might br not someone who can always smile and play ard. I can be sad. And bein sad is somethin humans have which is emotions. Why cnt i have? Isit too much? Or am i givin out too much of emotionals. But what i do? Try to be me for 15 mins and eu will noe why i said that. I dun understand anythin happenin ard me.. I seriously dun.

Maths is killin me. Again and again, goin at such a speed would cause me to be crazy, mentally. Too much for me to handle, ecerythin, everyone ard me seemed to understand and i dun. Practice and practice. Mustakes and mustakes. Learn and learn. Then new chapters come in. I feel that i am only takin one subject and not others. Obly maths. Ppl asked hows eur maths? I failed and they gave that looked. Totalli lost, like totalli.

I realli love today although tgere are some downs.

Overall ratin for today: 7/10 (:

Attuide is the problem, and i hate it.

2010-03-23T09:06:00.001-05:00

I aint important. Junling would kill me if i say this again.

Seriously, i am not tryin to get attention of whatsoever fuck la hor. Jus people have their high and low and i am experiencin mine now, eu too experienced it before. I can understand eu, why cant eu do the same and jus shut up by not crappin so much. Dun be a humji tryin to talk big behind a screen la. Talk straight face to face wif me.

Ignore the previous post if eu are 16 and below and from Deyi, cos i am not talkin abt eu. (:

I had to say. I had a terrible day today. Only 1 ppl noe why...
HAHAS, i will get over it somehow. (:
Thanks for lettin me noe that _______. (:
HAHAS! well, mock exams starts tmr.
And i have no idea why i post becos no one ever reads my post.

HOT N COLD

2010-03-20T11:58:00.001-05:00

Kathy Perry's Hot n Cold is gonna be in hits again. As the world now is experiencin the exact same thin!!!!!
Its been super duper cold since mornin. I think i have master the arts of puttin on a jacket and removin in jus one day. When its hot, is wth, where is the cool breeze, when its cold, is like wth, too much breeze. Yeah, its super contridictin, jus like that weather, jus what, i complete almost most of the holiday assignment. Woohoo~ its almost 1am now. Guess i shall make this post short and sweet. Weekends- as usual. Nothin special on fri. Hahhas, so yeah, it's summarised. (: gtg get my beauty sleep le. I dun wab black eyes~~~ *-*

Secrets are never meant to be told , to be shared.

2010-03-18T09:47:00.005-05:00

Its been awhile since i last posted aye?
-Sunday,
Went to Novena to shop and dine there. Surprisingly, i met Catherine and Vivian there. Bought prezzies for the two bdae girls,
Wanying and WaiMei. Hahas, after that, i realised i was in a shopping mall and at that tye almost all the shops are close. Reached home at ard 11 pm plusss??? Forget le. And there is school tmr.

-Monday and Tuesday,
At the thght of yayness, its holiday, we have to go back to sch like any other normal days and great is HOLIDAYS!
Not to mention we have trucks lots of homework and I still have one and a half day workload from the classes i missed last week. This break is ruin. We went back to sch and only for a few subjects, mostly maths anyway. Mr Lau simiply pissed me off. Txtbook is wrong, whoah! Eu are seriously one good teacher. One who teaches students things AFTER the test and said the textbook is WRONG. great~ not.
Got damn low for the test.

- Wednesday,
Not a day for me aye. Went to work and then tuitioned wif Joon Tong and my bro and another guy in Maris Stella. He is realli mature for his age siah. And he sounded alot like Sean. At least, i think so. HAHAHAS! okay , then i wanted to chat with more people so i decided to ask them add me in msn . Lol! No la, is jus that, i wanna ask a long tye le but kip forgettin. Hahas, and i got to noe NIXON from 409'09 wa! Nice to meet eu! Funny guy though~ hahas.

- Thursday,
I was awoken by the loud msg ringtone msged to me by yoke huei. After much decision, we decided to chill out at BISHAN lib. HAHAS. what are eu thinkin? There are trucks alots of hw to be done. Went there to do homework. Met up wif Jia rui and Eline as they were oso headin to bishan lib to study. Thus, lets study together! Hahas! With jia rui ard, everything is funny when he does somethin. HAHAHAS! we got chased out of the silent reading room, kao, there isnt any more space outside siah and we are oso not makin any noise and oso not crowded inside only a few ah pehs only. Chase us out. -.- whatever, then we spotted MingYong solo-ing at a table so went to join him. Then after Joanna come, he went to join Joanna at the other table. Sry, we kinda of steal eur place.. Hahas! As it was rainin heavily outside, the temperature in the lib had a rapid dropped. Eline had her jacket on, i wore long sleeves while yoke huei and jia rui wore short sleeves. WE WERE FREEZIN!!! SO FREAKIN COLD! i wonder how jia rui survived throughout in the lib as yoke huei left early. Somehow yoke huei's and my parents had some sort of telepathy, they called us both at the exact same time TWICE. after yoke huei left, Eline and I wanted to grab a bite. However, the sign said that if eu are not usin lib materials, eu might be chase out from eur seat, so jia rui went to grab some videos. And of all the videos down there, he took POWER PUFF GIRLS! hahahas! Funny siah~ then Eline and I went to J8 basement One to grab a bite. We were still shiverin when we went to the basement. spotted KALE there. Omg! HahaHs! Missed her soooo much~ eat and chat wif Eline and we bith agree we dislike certain type of people. (: Secrets~ went back to the lib and after awhile, i had to leave. And then went home abd had dinner and bathe.
I did finish AMATHS BOTH PAPERS, CHINESE. and started on Emaths and ss and eng today. great. Must finish tmr. HAHAHAH!! (:

I seriously hate people who tell lies, everytime they tell one they would have to find another one to cover the one before up. I rather eu told Me the truth and nit until i found out eu had been lyin and the impact is more powerful. If eu told me the truth, i would only be angry at the actions eu have made. But if eu choose the other way, i would be angry gor eu actions and thr trust i had given eu. Its so annoyin aye? Maybe eu din notice it eurself, but everytime when eu tell lies, eu BEVER looked at my eyes and eu rub eur hands. So yeah, and eu think i am stupid enough to believe what eu had said especially when eu said the things twice in different version? Wake up lah and grow up, no nid to tell me lies. I rather eu hurt me now then eu hurt me deeper in the future. And uts sucks to noe people lied to eu jus to make eu feel eu are needed by them. Right? Thanks alot aye?

And and and, i din say it was eur fault right? I din. I jus simply give comments. Take it or leace it. Dun like? Too bad ah?am controllin eu life what? Seriously, eu nv notice that eur words hurt me and it is not jus once, twice, or thrice. MANY, go check the meanin of maby if eu duno aye? Dun fake wif me cos i aint a tHree years old kid and i aibt the girl eu used to noe. Yupps, i got an attuide eu might not like and yeah, thats me. I am not important to eu anyways. Why bother?

If the above two para gave eu question marks when eu read, i abt tokin abt eu. (:

Opposite

2010-03-13T09:45:00.002-06:00

Believe it or not, i learn how to spell OPPOSITE thrgh the HIgh5 series.
The years went passed so fast. Uh-huh, we are in 2010 now.
Things are different from the past. Why am i tokin about all these?

Great, jus when i thght everythin was okay, it got worst.
I thght my sickness is recoverin, wee, i am not sick as in illness, then it gormt worst and i am out of medication.
I thght he would stop botherin me butden my hwart kinda turned soft and i am troubled.
I thght i can jus treat eu as a friend but it turns out eu are the one that i looked forward to seein everytime i online.
I thght i hated eu but i jus cnt brin myself to.
I thght i knew what was i doin but sadly no.
i thght i made it clear to eu that is impossible but things jus go its way.

..............................

What should i do? I noe i am dumb.

Choices Have Consequences

2010-03-10T03:57:00.004-06:00

Heye!

Well, before i go any further, I would like to say GET WELL SOON! to all my sick peeps out there. (: Get well soon and esp to those healthy one, PLS DUN GET SICK! our class enrolment is gettin lesser day by day.. From the normal 39 to 38 to 36 to 34 to 33 to 32. dun go buy toto. -.-
okay, somethin out of the random. (: HAHAHA!

Okay, tmr went to school. PE had briefin about tgis upcomin Friday cross-country. joke siah. Ask us look out for dancin NCC cadets, immediately, 408 was like " i wan see Saba(?) dance." jiarui started it though. HAHAHA! DINT SWEAT, i din even do PE. LOL. =.=lll Then chemistry, yea, went thrgh SPA , miss kaur gave us some hints here and there for tmr. Then after that is history, miss the front part of the "video game" but manage to catch the rest, hahas, was funny siah though, oay lar, not realli funny, but the animation was cute, human head, cartoon body. PICTURE IT! HAHAHAS! Recess, damn empty lah, the canteen. LOL! hahahs, then after that, MATHS, well, spent the 1st period doin admin stuff and all these things, then start on CHAIN RULE FOR THE chap 15. din even started learnin it. -.- will try to catch up! THANKS ALOT MICHELLE!! (: and WEI WEI for tryin to explain and although eur are feelin warm, eu turned the fan away, cox i was cold. THANKS THANKS THANKS! (: then eng, we had compo test. HAHAHS! what a cool way to end the sch day. HAHAHAH! Then yoke huei accompanied me to wait for my mum to come and sign the GIRO form. hahahs. then after that.. find Mr peng, WA! He damn act cute lah, trin to slide my paper thgh the slight open of the staff room closed door, paper still can, still wan slide the zhi tong che. =.= HAHAHAHA! walked home wif yokehuei and my mum and suprisin, they both communicate well. -.-
HAHAHAHAHA!
did my homework, well, i have, in case eu wonder what homework, cox i missed 2 days in sch. HAHHAS!

Well, another thing, we got back our progress report though.. quite disappointed with my chem but at least i improved in most of the subjects although it is jus eu noe, COMMON TEST. HAHAHA. but its quite hapy, realli, imagine eu always see Cs in eur report suddenly all Cs become B, well low B... but least improve. HAHAHA! i learnt! hahas, then quite disappointin in Emaths, though i will make it. AMATHS! YEAH! I IMPROVED 16 marks! althought it is still F9 lah, BUT IS SHOWIN SOMETHIN! 1 more mark to E8!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!if i continue to work hard, i will do better and My next aim. MID-YEAR! hahahs! i will work hard.

To all,
DUN get disappointed, well eu should. But is only a small period of time yea? move on? rmb the camp? we are motivated, we have potential! SMILE AND WORK HARD! WE CAN DO IT! (: I BELIEVE, WHO ELSE BELIEVE?

2010-03-06T09:34:00.002-06:00

Hehehes, the camo is over. 3 days is soo fast!
In a blink of eye, its sat. Well, yesterday was a long day for the camp.
Realli motivatin camp, i think. Hahas!
Makes me think of my future, my hopes, my dreams and of course my dearest friends and family.
These two are the most important things in my life, yesterday after camp, i made my parents cry when i give them my letter,
really hope they were there to hear what i have said on stage.
I have no idea when did that courage came from to let me walked there, but i loved it even though i cried. Well, ppl do. Its like
a magic spell, when ppl talk abt family , they get sensitive and cry. Weakness. Hahas! Due to the lack of time, many people din get
the chance to say.. But we will listen if eu wanna speak.
Zuhaily! Stay strong! Touched by what eu had said even though is only a portion of it. 3 years plus of friendship, still countin, nv ends.
And to all those friends in my life, eu guys are the dearest to me, it hurts me even more when eu get hurt.. I noe i hv sent a msg to all, but
what i realli wan to say still has a lot to go, and i am happy that my best friend is not angry at me and msg me yesterday. I felt so happy!
Thanks to all those who stand up when asked who wan to help me in maths.
I noe some of eu wanted to help but eurs also need help, we shall study maths together!!! (: i truly understand.
I really turn ps when my name is mention in front of parents, i will do it man! I will strive of A1 even though the common test is gonna make my confidence fall again! Hahaha!
Friends, truly, i want to say alot alot to eu guys, i will find some way. Hahahas! I love eu guys tons! (: <3
i love my family too! (: never seperated! (:

2010-03-04T06:38:00.003-06:00

Heye, i am back!

Well, started from the camp yesterday by activities and then horrhs.
I forget le.
Today horrhs, started off the day by writin msg on their backs.
Then after that., we are suppose to roam around the classroom, but ended up doin a tootoo train.
Fun siah. After that, the trainer made us write abt things that are distractin we all.
Then lunch break, quite emo. Hahs. Lol! That after that, went back.
Freddy thrn show us how a woman survive thrgh her life when 60% of her body is burnt.
Omg! I cried when she said that she had not blame the pplerson who did that to her and even hugged that guy's mother.
Then after that, he went on to how fortunate we are, then abortion. Then what our parents did when they had us. The feelins.Was already tearin already. Thrn he asked him to imagine the scene of how many years later. Got almost whole room of students cryin. I think i was out of the loudest, cnt stop. Can feel the lost and everythin. The fear of losin our parents whom we rely greatly on. And the fear of them leavin. Imagonation can be so wild. For some ppl, they din cry becox of the imagination but by ppl around them who cried. Family seemed to be everyone's weakest weeakness.
Is soo embrassin to cry but when alot of ppl did it together, it seemed so natural . Everyone is feelin the same think, thinkin abt what we are sorry for. Thinkin abt what we had made them angry. The sourness of all these. Everyone was in tears. Everyone encouraged each other, cheered everyone up. Tmr i think i better brin more tissues.

I finally noe how foolish am i , from now on i'll go wif the flow

2010-02-27T07:52:00.002-06:00

like i said, i finally noe how foolush am i after * . and it creeps me out, alot alot. Few understands.
Been readin the news and saw how much the world had transform? Diseasters, takin away lives, destroyin houses.
I am indeed fortunate, livin in singapore, unless diseaster strikes singapore, well it will, from near future. It really depends on Gods.
The sun is soo strong. People gettin sick, all this. Here i am, healthy, great livin conditions , everything jus fine. And i am here complainin
about worst life, bad grades, education, what a brat i am? I should be geavily punished. I am so fortunate. From since duno when, i kip tellin myself how unless i am how stupid i am, whatsoever, i wanna die , wanna disappear, i am very sure alot ppl get this from me and i am pretty sure they are sick of it. Well, i have learnt, life is precious and i should not take it for granted.. Eu may be surprise that that incident made me learn, but actions speak louder than words. Sometimes, i realli hate myself alot alot, i find myself very troublesome and irritatin, well i cbt say its over as i cnt change completely in a day's time. I might be emotional, my targets are high, but i am definately who i am inside and outside.
I am a straightforward person, sometimes i would jus say somethin random. Haha! But all these come from my inner side, my crazy side. Who am i and what i live for. Yet, eu might be wonderin, whats up wif her? Yes? Hahas, let me clear eur doubts. Nothin actually happen, jus somethin triggers my brain and make it reload and make me think about the things i have done, yes, the past is the past. Whats done cant be undone. This is what eu go throygh to learn the differences in life, i mus not gv up. I will stay strong , happy and cheerful. The sun is strobg, so is my heart and soul. The world is changin, so is me. I have grown up , maybe more mature. Been think and lookin at msn histories, how dumb am i. Hahs! Well, thats me. Kimberly. Am i right?

Yeap, i am prefectly normal. Or maybe more mature after *. Hahs! Ojay, a new life have been given to me and i will treasure it, right guys? (:
and i will continue smilin for all who make me smile. (:

2010-02-26T08:33:00.002-06:00

Oh ya, term 1 is like endin in a few weeks time. And its only the 9th week and eu experience tests every single day.
Like what the hell. Hahhahs!

Okay, the weather is jus super hot la can! Grrrr.
And yeah. Short post. Tmr more. Gtg bb!

Thanks ya!

Tired~

2010-02-25T07:42:00.002-06:00

Well~ i think many people are tired too, not jus me, so i wont complain on it.

Today like expected. But i did go for cca in the end. Hahhas! Lol!
Anyways, like i expected, we have a camp from adam khoo. I tink it would be okay...
No one noes right? Lol!
Sians, the moment eu get eur head off the camp, test test test come runnin in to eur mind.
Funny how brain works. So fast!
Shit man! Flu gettin up, at first its minor then it got worst and now i have problems wif my throat!
Doctor is needed desperately before i fall sick! Lol! I am sick already. Lol! Stupid weather, cannot decide when to give us nice weather.
Ooh, weather gods, wake up.
Lol! Have to go and study ss le. Bye~

2010-02-24T04:03:00.002-06:00

Before i continue any further, i would like to wish Eugene, happy birthday!! (:

Heye, i am back wif a proper post! I noe eu missed my post right? -.-
okay nvm.

Yesterday,
had a wonderful day at eng remedial, mrs singh is damn funny.
We planned how to disturb Kelvin, but ended we did do anythin but is mrs singh the one sayin Kelvin.
HAHAS! then started the day was maths then history, did test. Then chi test, then recessed, then chem then cc and assembly.
Assembly was damn racist! Only those learn chi wan would understand. Noe is abt cny la. But oso racist mah.
Then went remedial, walked home wif pei and yoke. Dinner wif vic and sheryl and family at sakura yio chu kang after tuition at amk wif vic.
It was my mum's bdae! Hehehe. And my cousin's , mingxiu's . Hahahas! And alot more.

Today,
mornin, go school sleep. Then before sleep do homework, then after that mornin assembly. Then PE, then chem and history and recessed.
Then amaths then eng then rest then amaths remedial then go home then yoke called me but i nv listen then spotted her at traffic light then walked home wif her then i went to bathe then sleep then now doin emaths then later dinner. How many then i have? Then then then. Hahhas!

Tmr,
had lessons then maths then maths test then ve, did history test then chem remedial then cca then dinner then tuition.
Or maybe, i dun go cca tmr, cos of ss test. Hahahs!

Thanks God!

2010-02-22T09:09:00.003-06:00

Sorry Don! :( i dino he will attack eu.. But he cnt tag already. Hahahs!
Sorry Sorry! :(

Today had cca hahas okay okay la. Borin. Well tmr is my mum and cousin and many more bdae
hahhahas
and yea, the start of tests. Cool huh, jus gt back from tuition wif joon tong, hahhas
laxy post more le, bye!

See? I told eu right? Try and tag la! Bastard

2010-02-21T07:57:00.002-06:00

EH, EU GOT NOTHIN BETTER TO DO ISIT? DUN MESS WIF ALL MY FRIENDS OR ELSE ....
PLS LA, GET A LIFE MAN! EU LEAD EURS, I LEAD MINE. I DUN MIND GETTIN VULGAR FOR ONCE HUH. FUCK OFF AND GET EUR OWN MISERABLE LIFE, I HUAN LO LEH, EU HUM JI MAH? SHUT THE ASS HOLE MOUTH UP MAN!

Phew~ i dino why did i even post this in the first place. Totalli pollute my entire blog. -.-
jus for once. Once. Once. Yeah, once. Lol.
Eh, i am not one whom eu can throw eur temper on me whenever eu wan okay? I am not eur punchin bag! Sucker!

2010-02-20T06:15:00.003-06:00

*pissed off wif my parents, dun wanna tok abt it here!

Today was totally sucky, ruin my mood. Anyways, like i stated i watched Percy Jackson yesterday.
Gosh! So cool la! Hahs! Dunno if got part 2. The last part very funny. The stepfather turn into stone.
Ahahs, i laughes thoughout the movie, cant blame me. I laugh at almost everythin, cox its super funny. Hahas
i wish to watch it again. Haahs! Maybe i go buy the dvd. I am in love with the show! Hahas!
In April there is a show comin, "kiss-ass" the show name might brin some notice. Saw the adver. Sooo funny and i hope its interestin
its realli funny. Superheros without super powers. HAHA! and they cnt fly.
Haha, there is a list of movies that i wanna watch though..
1) Alice In The Wonderland
2) Dragons
3) Kiss-ass
maybe these.. Or more.. I cnt rmb. HAHAHA! But these are top 3 la. Hahas!
hahaha! Well, oh ya! HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIANG YEOW! i noe eu will nv come here. But ya.
Hahas. Tmr is Bertrand's. Hahas!

I tink my post is short. But i got nothin to talk abt. Hahas! Whatever~

When will eu stop what are eu doin? It hurts and its freakin freakin irritatin and annoyin. Jus wanna seek attention rite? Fine. Dream on. I wont gv eu any attention. Cox i hate eu and stop sendin me any messages, i noe eu read my blog, so what? Big deal? My friends oso read what, what make eu soo special? And yea, i din have a lonely valentine's eu noe, i enjoyed mine very very very very much without eu and eu are the one with lonely valentine? I am hush? This is the way i am, ask my friends on the tagboard la, they will say i am like dat, dun like? Get lost la, act until eu are like soo freakin holy. like to act go join drama la, or go actin class! I dun wan to be eu audience and judge. What? Not happy? Then dun read la, i din use a knife and what shit to make eu read what? Get lost la huh? Eu are makin my life miserable...

2010-02-19T05:22:00.002-06:00

I got what i want but lost what i wanna do.
I got to watch Percy Jackson tonight but i lost the chance to go to Joon Tong's house! Boohoo!
Haha... Nvm i shall go his house so other time since is near~
anyway, gpt to go out soon~ hahas!

Today helped ppl deco the card. Hahas! Butden feel sorry f0r don's ... Not very nice leh...
... Duno whether he handed up or not.. If not i wan do another one..

Next week, almost everday day g0t test.
Mon- ss(?) , chi (?) idk isit on mon
tues- history
wed - amaths
thurs- emaths
fri - hmmm...

Yet i am still enjoyin. Aiya, who cares! I am jus goin to make myself enjoy these few days. Hahas!

2010-02-18T04:53:00.001-06:00

Hello Earthings! I hereby stated that i haven do my homework!
Damn it!

Woah, wanying jus turn my tagboard into a wow! Good good! Continue taggin! Will link eu soon. Hahas!
Anyways, today nv regret go cca even thgh i kip complainin i wan to slp.
Well today was quite a borin day, i say.
It was like totally NICE only durin english and we did oral.
The meihui was very unlucky and got called to read.
She protested she jus woke up cox her readin sounded like very bo gan wan.
Hahahhas!! Anyways, i want to update on what thing i oso duno le.
Hahas! Gtg tuition. Chat soon?

2010-02-15T21:49:00.002-06:00

Oooooh! This is soooo nooot fun!!! Soooo many people watch Percy Jackson already!!!!!
I wan to watch! Watch!!!!! Grrrrr.
I will bite! Howl!
Wanying oso watch le!! Eeee! Hmph!

Omg, i sounded like one baby. -.-
Anyways, we are goin back to sch tmr!! How NICE!!
Dint go back to Townsville . Hhas!
Btw, i earned quite alot. Hahahahahaahhahas! Durin a game.

Ang bao more more! Lol! This is retarded. Ignore it! Wahahaha!

More peoplecomin later! Too bad! I am busy~ hahaha! Nah, kiddin.
No one online~

2010-02-14T20:29:00.003-06:00

I super love all these days man.
Without homework, without stress, without worries about results.
Its soo relax, go out whole day for visitin, no tuitions, no studies.
Suddenly very empty.
And i suddenly feel very sorry to some ppl, those who helped...
Is like they oso have their own matters and i am floodin them with mine...
I realli hope they can oso tell me their problems.. {:
Eu noe hu eu are. {: hahahas.

Stayed my grandmother's house yesterday. Played cards. Bertrand is diguatin man. Win so much. Hahahas!
Anyway, i would be goin to Eunice's house later!
At PIONEER... SO FAR! hahaha! I am sooo jealous of Junling. She watched lightning theif le!!!
I am so desperate to watch it!!!!!! I wan to watch!

2010-02-13T09:53:00.000-06:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

2010-02-13T00:05:00.003-06:00

Happy Birthday Doreen! {:

Hahahas, this picture is taken when we participate in the syf. and on the way backto sch. so miss our hair..anyways, 16 liao leh, dun be so childish. pig! enjoy eur CNY and Happy Birthday, i will get eu a belated present if i rmb. {: I LOVE EU!

right, today is chinese new year eve. would be goin to grandma house later and eat dinner, hahas. so fast, cny come. HAHAHAHAHAS! enjoy this days. i've completed my entire homework for the break and i am happy! hahas, i get a break!

i changed the blog skin and picture and the name and the blog song. hahahs. lol.its jus a brand new look and the title doesnt reflect anythin, jus a random thingy, dun think anywhere. and i noe eu would think that i am forgivin eu, but NO. hahahs, too bad la. its just a new look, i lazy to update links. HAHAH! maybe i will do it, when i am realli realli bored. hahahs.

yea, i thought about it, thanks for eur advice always {: hahas, realli apperciate it. i will make my own decision and thanks for those who supported me, when i am goin to drown.. its a whole new year , i will try and maintain a cheerful side, i will try not to ... i will, and i can do it. (maybe). but i will try my best.

JIA RUI! Happy New Year, think eu are in Malaysia now. enjoy eurself there aye? HAHAHA! i noe eu wont read de. {: butden hor, get some prezzies. people, pls tag me, my tagboard is diein. HAHAHS!

HAHHAA! i got a colourful post today, guess it reflects my mood. on one hand, i did my homeworks, on the other hand, i am goin to relax later and ITS PIG'S BIRTHDAY! {:

signin off BYE! {:

i just cant stop it.

2010-02-08T06:53:00.002-06:00

Not sure what am i doin, or thinkin.
It doesnt concern me..
Is my life, when i say i duno is really DUNO! Get that straight int0 eur fuckin head.
Wth! Eu noe what am i goin thrght mah? Say i fake, eu think i wanna fail? Go bang eur head against the bloody wall lah.
Whn i say i noe, eu say i duno. What kind of teacher are eu lah.
How i noe whether i noe or i dunno. I noe right! Is me who is studyin !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!

2010-02-05T07:10:00.003-06:00

Today mornin simply sucks, come to think of that now, i am very sorry... SORRY those in 408! {:

Then ... err...

social studies test, HAHAHA! i duno if i will pass or fail but its finally over. hahas, then had maths rite? i can understand differentiation for goodness sake! {: hope to PASS in the followin test, i give up totalli on plane geom. that doesn't makes any senses to me. haha, it dun like me. LOL!
afterwards, its chinese test, i dun like the endin of the passage, its sad... well, life is unpredictable. HAHAHS! well, even though the test is quite okay, eu din have to say so loud, there are people who will get demoralised kays, jus kip to eurself, same goes to amaths. i noe eu are clever, so what? demorlised people? LOL! nah, i not so bad. {:
recessed wif HAHAHAHAHA! lol, its wif amanda, sheryl, yoke huei, vic and mh. cox shiying there, no space to sit.
English, write journal about HANDPHONES. lols, the previous entries she gave me a very long remark, one A5 page long. HAHAHS!
then physics, well, ONE OF THE DAYS, eu actualli like physics is today, is totalli awesomeeee! its nice, its fun! {: esp when zul and don did the chipmunks thingy. HAHAHAS! cute!
then after school, when for the ss "re-test". yea, hahahaha! then slacked around canteens with Justin, Junling, Michelle, Sean, Joon tong, Jasmine, Claire, Samantha, Jia min, Jesslyn and Corin. afterwards, departed and homed.
went for tuition, my last lesson there, jus got to noe Juliana and Tiffany... But i am glad i can see them every sunday at chemistry, hope it will be fun wif more people. {:
my cousin ps me, so i went home myself after buyin food. then I dino Jiarui was already behind me, i still walk across the road then on the stairway , he suddenly popped out and made me jump. walked together, he went to brin his bro to tuition, hahahs, then went homed ate! man, i am ravenous. i was actualli. anything...

then after that, i onlined . currently talkin to Yoke huei, don, mh, yul, qy and ly. {:
and listenin to my favourite songs! {:

* Eu are not goin to be able to hurt me anymore, cos i have become strong. i will be happy not for eu, but myself. i need time, yes, i will make eu jealous of me recoverin fast. *

2010-02-04T08:18:00.003-06:00

I am gettin more and more tired and scared as days passed.
I have limited time at home and home is like jus a place for me to sleep.
Even though i din say much..
Its the decision thats makin me tired out.
Maybe only sm ppl understand...
Who will realli help me? Only myself.
Hahas...
I may smile and cheer ppl up. Who will do the same to me?
Not askin for pity. Who does dat?

Yes, i ve changed. Maybe eu dun lye the ME now, but thats too bad. I cnt be the same
The whole thing. Do eu noe how tired it is? People change, eu too, eu din even notice.
If thats the case, why be so bothered? May as well live our own life.
I am not angry . I am jus sad. Sad that EU are the one sayin it. I will stop lovin eu. And i wont
Not be in eur life anymore. Good luck and bye.

2010-02-02T08:01:00.002-06:00

I cut my hair ans rebond it, looks weird leh. Hahas! Try and get use to it. Cos i havn too. Lol.

Its funny how things work these days, when eu cared for ppl, they think eu are annoyin, when eu ignored them completely, they starts to gumble.

*dude, eu've changed, from last year till now, its a big difference, maybe eu din notice it but the things eu do these days, make me feel eu are overdoin. Its not worth, get over it! *

Well, had a nornal day jus like any other day.

Dun wish to continue, duno why i even started this post...
No mood at all.. Brain dead, heart dead. Time is runnin out.
Move on! I cnt be forever dead..

SNSD IS RELEADIN THEIR ALBUM THIS MONTH!!! at least is good news. {:

2010-01-30T02:25:00.003-06:00

[edited]

My internet went crazy! just like me, had flag day today, was so tirin, i went wif yoke huei from 300+ to 400+ to 500+ then 600+ then back to hub. HAHAHAS!
was utterly pissed by the HLH pl, pls, duno how follow the rule, then dun come out and disgrace eurself. LOL. anyway, my legs are tired now and its a tirin day, got to find out those ppl's attuide, one AUNTIE still say borin. WTH?! is for the charity!! then the rest show some faces. NEXT TIME WHEN I SEE DONATION CANS, I WILL DONATE. i will, so tirin.

went lunch with MICHELLE, SEAN, DON, CHEW YING, KHAIRI, PEI, OCTOPUS, JUN YANG and GRACE and HUI JUN. HAHAHS, it was fun man. i hope i can stay out often, hahahs. THEN I GTG bb. lol

[/edited]

2010-01-27T06:04:00.003-06:00

JUNLING AYE! Take care of eurself!! PLEASE!! (:

Today had PE, had beep test, wth, i gave up! Lol! Told eu i cnt run. Somemore i...
Wah! Zuhaily and Kelvin realli rocks man!
Then, Junling not feelin well, but she got better! (:
Chem, miss kaur decided to let us rest..
Then history watch show,
Recessed, mr lee din come so the whole class went back late.
2 free periods..
Then after that , the only period we had today is english.
Slack then went home wif yoke huei. Saw IVY! (:
then after tat went swimmin. I am tanned, i think.
Browsed thrgh some blogs, lol. Hate then hate like i care??! Lol! Lame shit siah.
Nvm kimberly nvm, people havnt grow up. Must understand them. lol!

Hahs! Anyway. Bye bye! (: lol!